Come What May
by Ari-Ana Zanne
Summary: (Formerly "I'm With You") *finished* Takes place between Episode II and Episode VI. My version of Episode III and Anakin's conversion.
1. The Dream

Disclaimer: The characters used in this story (except Donick) belong to the Almighty Flanneled One, George Lucas and Lucasfilm. No money is being made. This is just all in harmless fun. Excerpts from the novelization of _Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace_ written by Terry Brooks, the script from _Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi_ written by George Lucas and Lawrence Kasdan, phrases from _Come What May_ written by David Baerwald, and _Your Song_, written by Elton John and Bernie Taupin, have been used. 

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"I apologize, my lord. We've lost them. They seem to have jumped unexpectedly into hypersp-- " The man in the greenish-gray uniform gasps as if being choked, though no hand is laid upon his throat. The decoration on his chest signifies that he holds a high ranking in whatever government for which he works. He grabs his throat with both hands and collapses onto the floor.

"Apology accepted, Admiral," I hear someone say in a deep voice, followed by loud, raspy breathing. 

Inhale . . . exhale . . . inhale . . . exhale . . .

I turn to my left and see a man with a black cape and helmet striding down the corridor, away from the man I know only as 'Admiral', whose body is being toted away by a pair of men dressed in simple black uniforms. The raspy breathing follows the dark man as he stops outside a door and enters a room.

I bolt after him to find out his identity because I feel a strange connection to him that I can't explain. The door slides closed right behind me.

In the middle of the room, I see a huge black sphere and the dark man punching a code into the keypad on the outside. A white zigzag line with squared points, appears around the center; the top half of the sphere is evidently being suspended due to the sequence the man had entered. Once the top is fully suspended, the man steps inside the bright white interior and sits down in a seat in the middle, facing me. He wears a full black mechanical suit. The chest plate has many buttons, controls, and flashing lights. His facemask protrudes in a snout over where his nose and mouth would be, cut off with a triangular grill from which the raspy breathing seems to be coming. A polished durasteel cylinder with activation buttons and handgrips hangs from his belt: his lightsaber. He lifts a black-gloved hand, activates a machine which takes the helmet and mask from his head, and leans temporarily out of my line of sight behind one of the "teeth" of the bottom half of the sphere. When he sits back up, I see his face clearly.

He is pale-complexioned and bald with many deep scars covering his whole head. He appears to be in his late forties to early fifties, though this approximation might be exaggerated due to the scarring and deep, purple bags under his eyes. When I look into his piercing blue eyes, a cold chill runs through me; this man is me. He is scarred extensively and considerably older than I am, but there is no denying it. This evil man is me.

Suddenly, the sphere starts to whir and the top half begins the journey to rejoin with the bottom half. The man gazes into my frightened eyes, sadness flooding into the space between us. Just as the sphere closes, a weak voice is emitted from the sphere: "This is your fate, Young One, if you give in to your hate and fear . . . "

I sat straight up, breaking out in a cold sweat, breathing heavily. I felt my face and head; there were no scars and my short-cropped hair, along with Padawan braid hanging behind my right ear, was still there. I closed my eyes and sighed in relief, wiping the sweat from my face and neck.

There was a stirring beside me, and I felt a hand on my bare shoulder.

"What's the matter, Ani?" asked a soft voice.

I opened my eyes and looked over to the source of the voice: the woman sitting up beside me.

Moonlight was streaming in through the window, illuminating her soft, perfect face. Chestnut curls hung lightly over her shoulders, little wisps framing her face. Her deep brown eyes examined me worriedly.

Padmé.

My Padmé.

I shook my head and said, "Just a bad dream. I'm all right, love."

She smiled sweetly and leaned in to kiss my cheek. "Okay then. You better get back to sleep. We both have to get up early." She kissed me again and settled back under the sheets. 

I pushed my covers off and swung my legs around the side of the bed. I said, "No, I'm not tired anymore. I'm going to go for a walk; I need to get some air. I'll see you later, when we have breakfast with Obi-Wan and Jar Jar."

I started to stand up, but she grabbed my hand and pulled me back down. Wrapping her arms around my shoulders and resting her chin on my head, she said, "Be careful, Ani. You remember what happened the last time you went for a walk."

"Do I ever," I said, rubbing my still-sore left arm where I had been shot with a blaster by a gang of Rodians who tried to rob me. I turned around and looked deep into her eyes, holding her face gently. "I'll be careful, sweetheart. I won't leave you a widow." I grasped her left hand and kissed her ring finger, which held a golden band. Then I kissed her. As with every single time before then, I felt a flood of warmth come over me and a slight constriction in my chest.

I stood up and put on my dark brown Jedi tunic over my trousers, covered it with my black vest, and slipped into my dark brown, knee-high boots. I wrapped my nerf-hide belt around my waist and fingered the tube of polished metal that hung at my side: my beloved azure lightsaber which I had crafted myself as a culmination of my Jedi training. Wrapping my black cloak around my shoulders, I stepped into the cool night air of the city-planet, Coruscant.

I hailed a repulsorlift air taxi that took me to the Jedi Temple. The pyramidal building had four tall spires, coordinated to the cardinal directions, surrounding a central fifth one. The Temple had been set apart from the chaos of Coruscant's swiftly growing population and modernization, because meditation was a key practice in Jedi training. Quieting one's mind aided in the understanding of the energy field that surrounded, penetrated, and bound all life in the galaxy -- the Force. For over a thousand generations, the Jedi Knights had contemplated the Force so as to become one with it, to understand its will.

I took a turbolift up one of the spires to the floor where Master Yoda's quarters were located. I looked at the chrono on the wall down the hall; 3:17 in the morning, Standard Time.

I started to bring my hand up to the keypad to activate the signal that would alert Yoda to my presence. An inch away, I brought it down again. I thought to myself, _What if he gets cranky because I woke him up? He's probably still not too fond of me because of that incident with the ancient transcripts._ One day, I had been showing off with my lightsaber, spinning it around in the air dangerously fast. I lost control and it slashed through the pieces of durasheet that were the ancient transcripts. Luckily, they had been preserved in a special chemical and bonded right back together. I had still gotten stern lectures from both Obi-Wan and Yoda.

I shook my head and took a deep breath, pushing the button on the exhale. I heard the chimes inside the room and the sound of the diminutive, green alien stirring from his bed. In between the _shuffle-shuffle-clack- shuffle-shuffle-clack_ of him walking to the door, with the help of his crooked gimer stick, I heard him grumble, "Too old . . . midnight gallivanting . . . pesky Padawans . . . three o'clock in the morning . . . "

The door slid into its pocket in the wall, revealing the revered Jedi Master. Upon seeing me, Master Yoda, more sleepy-eyed and hunched over than usual, said, "Padawan Skywalker, early in the morning, it is. Need something, do you, hmm?"

"Yes, Master Yoda. I had a troubling dream, and I wanted to know what you had to say about it."

He must have seen the glint of fear in my eyes, because he dropped the façade of slight annoyance he had at being awoken so early and ushered me inside.

Once seated in a couple of cushioned chairs, I recanted my dream to him. All the while, he nodded, a worried look shining though slightly in his dark eyes. When I was done, he rubbed his chin with the three digits on his hand, his large, pointed ears twitching gently. He stood up and paced around the room, his tiny cane clacking on the hard floor. He muttered to himself and sat back down.

"Feared this, have I, for a long time, Young One. This dream, had you, a glimpse into the future, it is."

"Wait," I interrupted. "So, I'm doomed to become this evil, cold man?"

Yoda chuckled. "Always in a hurry, you are. Learn patience, you must. Allow me to finish. A vision of one possible future, it may be. Jedi can see only one possible future. Always in motion and impossible to see, the future is, and Dark Side clouds everything. For certain, nothing ever is. Just a nightmare, it also could have been. Dwell on it not. Meditate on this, I will. Back to your quarters with you. Sleep, rest. Need it, you do, Young One."

I stood up, bowed, and left the room and the Temple.


	2. Breakfast

I decided to walk back to Padmé's senatorial dwelling. She had specifically requested a building away from the Coruscant inner-city so she could see the stars at night. Therefore, her building was fairly close to the Temple. The light from the forest of skyscrapers was so luminous that true darkness was hard to find. Blackout transparisteel windows aided in blocking out the eternal day.

I climbed up the several stories to Padmé's suite, and entering the room, I saw that the bed had been made, and Padmé was in the refresher. She was never one to sleep when she was worried, and she was always worried when I went out at nights. I smiled and stripped down to my gray undershirt and trousers and sat cross-legged on the bed. I closed my eyes and focused on the Force, allowing it to envelop me in its eternity. I tried to see just exactly this dream had been, but if the Force knew anything, it wasn't talking.

After a few minutes of meditation, I felt a soft brushing of lips on my cheek and hands on my shoulders. Keeping my eyes closed, I inhaled deeply. Padmé always smelled intoxicating, like an exotic flower garden.

I opened my eyes and turned my top half to face her. Her hair was tossed back with a ribbon the same color of jade as most of her dress, and her face was glowing as she smiled at me. I had seen her many times in that flowing dress scattered with light pink flowers, but she looked incredible all the same.

She came around the corner of the bed and sat in my lap, leaning her head back. Through the thin fabric of my undershirt, I felt her hair swishing back and forth on my chest as she settled her head comfortably. I wrapped my arms around her tiny waist and kissed the top of her head. She grasped my hands with hers and sighed. After a few minutes of silence, she leaned her head back and gazed into my eyes.

The way she penetrated me with those soft eyes took me back to just a few months earlier, back on the lush emerald orb of Naboo, her homeplanet. The sun had just started to set, casting a golden glow over the whole landscape. I had stood next to her before the holyman on the balcony, which was covered with flowering vines that wound up and down the grand stone columns, overlooking the sparkling reflection of the majestic mountains in the placid lake.

She had been dressed in a beautiful white beaded gown that just brushed the ground, a long train trailing beautifully behind her. Her hair had hung gently underneath the formal headpiece, almost hidden by the veil. I had been wearing my formal Jedi robes, trying my best to keep conscious, despite the rush of emotions running through me and the sight of my Padmé before me.

Out of the corner of my eye, I had glimpsed the only two witnesses to the ceremony: C-3PO, the protocol droid, which I had put together back on Tatooine when I was but a child; and R2-D2, an astromech droid who had saved Padmé's ship when she ruled as queen of Naboo, as she fled from the Trade Federation's illegal invasion of her planet. 3PO nodded approvingly in my direction as R2 let out a jubilant whistle.

This had been just after my Master, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda, and I had fought Count Dooku, one of the leaders of the Separatist movement, on Geonosis. So, I had a temporary golden robotic arm to my right side where Dooku had sliced mine off with his crimson lightsaber. Padmé had held my hand just the same as we had said the ancient marriage vows and exchanged rings. As I had leaned in to kiss her for the first time as my wife, she had looked into my eyes, into my very soul, and mouthed the words, "I love you." As she did, a single tear had fallen down her cheek. I had reached for her hands once again, pulled her close, and kissed her.

"Anakin," she said.

I opened my eyes from the memory and looked back at her.

"It's about time for you to go back to the Temple. You better head over there quickly. You're supposed to be in your quarters, asleep."

I looked up at the chrono and started with shock; surely Obi-Wan was up by now and wondering why I wasn't in my bed. I jumped up, dressed quickly, and hurriedly hailed an express air taxi to take me back to the Temple. I entered, making sure no one was in the entrance lobby, and bolted to the turbolifts, punching in the floor number that housed my quarters.

When the doors slid open, I checked up and down the hallway. Upon seeing that the coast was clear, I hastened to my room, threw myself though the sliding doors after I punched in the entry code, tore my clothes off, and jumped into bed. Not two seconds after I had forced my breathing back to normal, I heard the hum of the door as my Master stepped in.

"Anakin," he called. "Wake up. We have to meet the senators for breakfast in an hour."

I rolled over, cracking my eyes open as if I had just woken up, and yawned. "Yes, Master. I'll be right up."

Obi-Wan Kenobi was an interesting man to have as my Master. When he and I had first met, I had been a boy of nine whom his Master, the late Qui-Gon Jinn, had rescued from slavery on Tatooine. I had the impression that Obi-Wan had been jealous of the attention his master had paid me. Qui-Gon's dying wish, however, had been for Obi-Wan to train me to become a Jedi. He had felt very strongly, as did Obi-Wan now, that I was the Chosen One of ancient prophecy: a Jedi, born quite possibly of the Force itself ( I had had no father; my mother, Shmi, had conceived, borne, and raised me all alone.) who would bring balance to the Force once again. 

At first, the Jedi High Council wouldn't let me be trained since I was too old to begin the training, even though I had an extraordinarily high concentration of midi-chlorians in my bloodstream. (Midi-chlorians are microscopic lifeforms that reside in the cells of all living things. They form a symbiont relationship and reveal the will of the Force. When one learns to quiet the mind, one can hear them speaking.) All Jedi were identified within their first year of life, tested for Force-sensitivity, and taken from their families to learn in the ways of the Force under the Jedi Masters at the Temple. Eventually, after Qui-Gon's death, Yoda had reluctantly agreed to allow Obi-Wan to train me after the newly-pronounced Jedi Knight had threatened to train me with or without the permission of the Council..

Obi-Wan was a little shorter and stockier than I was, had light reddish-brown, shoulder-length hair and facial hair; his bright blue eyes rivaled my own. He was a determined man and a great Jedi Knight. He and I had grown very close, as teacher and student and best friends. I looked to him as the father I had never had.

Even so, I knew that I had to sneak around to be with Padmé in situations other than those of business. Jedi Knights were outright forbidden to marry. If Obi-Wan knew Padmé and I had eloped as we did, he'd have been furious and probably would have told the Council, who would no doubt expel me from the Order. I had to be careful.

As I sat on the side of my bed and stretched sleepily, lifting my left arm and new, realistic-looking right arm prosthetic above my head, Obi-Wan eyed me with suspicion. He looked as if he were trying to read into my thoughts, but I had learned to bury them deep down, out of even his reach. 

He finally gave up, reached down, picked up my undershirt, and threw it at me. 

As it landed on my face, he said, "Learn to be a little more tidy, Padawan. This room is a mess, clothes everywhere. You would think that a bantha had been in here.

"Sorry, Master. I'll pick them up."

He nodded and left the room. Rolling out of bed, I breathed a sigh of relief and started to dress.

An hour later, Obi-Wan, Padmé, Jar Jar Binks, and I were seated around the breakfast table in the Temple's dining hall. Padmé and Jar Jar were talking politics while Obi-Wan and I politely listened.

Jar Jar was another life form Qui-Gon had saved. He was a Gungan, an amphibious species native to Naboo. He had come a long way from the swamp he used to call his home by cultivating an interest in politics and becoming a representative from Naboo, along with Padmé. Jar Jar had become a representative after Senator Palpatine had been elected as Finis Valorum's successor as Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Senate of the Republic.

"Mesa tink," Jar Jar was saying, "wesa should squash 'em like da bugs." He pounded one webbed-fingered fist into another open palm. "Boom! Theysa gone bye-bye." His long earlobes flapped against his shoulders as he laughed at his own joke. He then shoved some more purple fruit into his protruding snout and smacked noisily.

_Same old Jar Jar,_ I thought to myself. _You can take the Gungan out of the swamp, but you can't take the swamp out of the Gungan._

When we were finished eating, everyone stood. Jar Jar and Padmé had a Senate meeting shortly and had to prepare themselves. On her way out, Padmé sneaked a wink at me, and I smiled as the door slid closed behind her. Obi-Wan and I went out a door on the opposite side of the hall and down a corridor, toward the Council Chamber where we were expected right after breakfast.

"So, Padawan, how did you sleep?" asked Obi-Wan.

"Like a baby," I replied, somewhat dreamily.

"Have good dreams, did you then?"

I snapped back and darkened a little. _Master Yoda said not to dwell on it, but I must tell my Master._ I told Obi-Wan about the dream and asked his thoughts on it.

"Well, it could be one of many things. It could have been a glimpse into the future, or a memory of something you might have heard and long since forgotten about, or merely a bad dream."

"I asked Master Yoda about it this morning, and he said the same, but not to dwell on it."  
"Pay heed to his advice then, my young Padawan."

We were approaching the doors to the Chamber. Obi-Wan stopped about ten feet from them and said quietly, "I know you weren't in your own bed last night, but I think I know where you went."

I glanced in his direction, quickly removing the fear from my eyes. He squeezed my left shoulder with his right hand and smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry. I won't tell. You are grown enough to make your own decisions, be they right or wrong. I warn you, however, to proceed with caution."

I let out the breath I had been holding in and said, "Master, I've just never felt this way about anyone. It's wonderful to be around her. She never ceases to cheer me up, no matter to what extent I'd been upset. She loves me deeply, and I her. I can't leave her, but I can't leave the Order either. I couldn't let you down, Master. Just please, give me some time."

"Make sure you think it through thoroughly before you do anything rash, Anakin. I only want the best for you. You know how fond I am of you, like a father for his son."

I nodded and said, "It's mutual, Master."

He smiled, and we entered the Chamber.


	3. ObiWan's Realization

After the meeting, we went back to my quarters. Obi-Wan told me to sit down on my bed, that he had a story to tell me.

"Yes, Master," I said. As I complied, I almost kicked off my boots into the middle of the floor, thought twice about it, and put them at the end of my bed. Then I turned around and faced him, cross-legged. He had sat down in a chair and was getting comfortable. He looked up at me and began.

"When I was your age, maybe a little younger, I too fell in love. Now, before you laugh," he said as he saw that mischievous glimmer in my eye, "hear me out. Your old Master was attractive at one time."

I stifled a laugh and quickly apologized. "I'm sorry, Master. It's just -- "

"Don't worry about it. I was expecting that response from you. But you must not laugh, or I won't be able to tell this story, and I think it may help you."

"Yes, Master. No laughing." I put on the most seriously straight face I could muster.

"All right then. As I was saying . . . I, too, fell in love. Master Qui-Gon and I had an assignment on a distant planet -- my memory fails me as to which one. Anyway, we were to free a group of enslaved females. Mind you, this planet wasn't too distant as to be outside the Republic's jurisdiction. Of course, most of them were female Twi'leks, but there were a couple of human women. The instant my eyes met with Kaya's, I was entranced. I couldn't think of anything or anyone else. Does this sound familiar?"

I nodded. That was how I had felt when I first laid eyes on Padmé in Watto's junk shop so long ago.

"Well, that night, I sneaked out after Master Qui-Gon had fallen asleep, which was fairly early. I crept to the place we had taken the group for safe-keeping until we left the planet, climbed up to the third floor, where their rooms were, and peeked into windows until I found in which room Kaya was sleeping."

"Master!" I exclaimed, truly surprised.

"Hey, you do crazy things when you're in love. You, if anyone, should know that."

I nodded, and he continued.

"Well, I let myself into the room. Careful not to awaken the other three girls, I woke up Kaya and took her out into the hall and into an empty room.

"She was so beautiful, with the moonlight streaming through the window onto her wavy, red hair that reached well passed her shoulders. Her lean, tall body was still dressed in just the night gown she'd been given by the owners of the building. I gazed deep into her rich sapphire eyes. Neither of us spoke for several minutes. We just stared."

Obi-Wan's eyes were staring into nothing, entranced by the memory. I cleared my throat nonchalantly to bring him back to the story. He started and blushed slightly.

"Oh -- yes -- well . . . I had never been in love before and I didn't know what it felt like. All I knew was what I was feeling at that moment: a flood of warmth flowed through my veins, my head pounded, my heart raced, my chest constricted. Is this how you would describe your feelings for Padmé?"

"Exactly, but add in getting dizzy at the sight of her and feeling tingly all over at every thought of her, flashing back to wonderful memories of when we were together, like" -- I got lost in the thought -- "when we were on Naboo, looking out over the sparkling lake at sunset, after we had just given ourselves completely and totally to each -- "

"Ahem," Obi-Wan brought me back, looking at me sternly. "Is there something you need to tell me about your relationship with the senator?"

All color drained from my face, and my mouth went dry. I stuttered, "N-no, Master. What makes you think that?"  
He studied my face and closed his eyes for a moment. I quickly shut the memory from my mind, but not quickly enough. When he opened his eyes, I saw the look of realization.

"You two have . . . you're . . . ?" He stammered, trying to put together what he wanted to say. "You're _married!_" he said finally, practically yelling.

"Master, shh!" I slumped at being found out. "Yes, Master. When I escorted her back to Naboo after Geonosis. Only Artoo and Threepio were there, apart from myself, Padmé, and the holyman."

His eyes were wide with shock. He stood up and paced, and finally had to leave the room. I figured he had gone to either cool off or to tell the Council. I wasn't taking any chances, so I got dressed and started packing my things. Just as I had finished and was about to exit the room, the door slid open and Obi-Wan came in. His eyes were red and watering and that vein in his forehead was almost popping out. _He must have gone to the meditation room_ -- which was soundproof --_ to have a good scream_, I thought to myself.

He took the travel bag from my shoulder and set it down. Taking my shoulders, he turned me around and led me back to the bed. He sat me down and sat himself down across from me. Taking my hands, he looked into my eyes and said, "Anakin, at first, I must admit I was horrified, appalled, astonished that you would be so impetuous about something as serious as marriage. But after a nice, quiet meditation -- "

I snorted slightly.

"All right, a nice, _loud_ meditation, I remember what it felt like to be young and in love. I also have enough faith in you to know that she must be really special to you. Though I might not approve of it, I accept it. And don't worry, not another soul will know."

I breathed a sigh of relief in gratitude. He reached over and embraced me warmly.

"Well," he said, leaning back into his chair, "shall I continue with my story or have we had enough excitement for one day?"

"I think I want to get some shut-eye, if you don't mind, Master."

"Go ahead, Padawan." He got up and went towards the door. He stopped, turned around, and said, "Just don't do anything I wouldn't do."

We both laughed, and I said, "Don't worry. No little Anakins will be conceived tonight."

"All right. Goodnight, Anakin. Tell Padmé I send my love and best wishes."

"I will, Master. Goodnight."


	4. The Ring

Once at Padmé's, I threw myself onto the bed and kicked off my boots, sighing with exhaustion. _Today has been quite tiring_, I thought to myself, waiting for Padmé to get back from her Senate meeting. Sometimes, these meetings took all day, depending on the agenda. They had been in there for a good eight or nine hours, since just after lunchtime. I sat up and went into the bathroom. After a short shower, I felt considerably better.

I waited for about ten minutes, but I got restless. All of a sudden, a scheme popped into my head. I picked up my boots, undershirt, tunic, and cloak and put them back on. I pulled a small holo-communicator from my utility belt, set it on her nightstand, and recorded a message. 

"Padmé, I'm going to be late tonight. I don't know yet how late, but I promise I will be there. Be ready."

I took the recorder chip out of the holo-comm and put it in her message box. Then I climbed out of the balcony and descended to the ground. Walking away from the building, I inhaled the crisp, scrubbed-clean air and wondered what Padmé's reaction to my scheme would be. Well, it wasn't so much a scheme as something she wouldn't expect. I smiled mischievously.

When I found the building I was looking for, I stepped inside, half-expecting it to be closed. The squat, jolly-faced old Gran looked up as I entered and beamed jovially at seeing me. He hurried from around the transparisteel display counter to grab my hand with both of his, shaking furiously.

"Anakin Skywalker! How good to see you again! How are you?"

I politely pulled my hand from his grip and answered, "I've been all right, Donick. I've taken a wife recently."

His mouth opened into a wide "O" and the orbs at the end of his trio of eyestalks widened in surprise. "Oh, Anakin, congratulations!"

"Thanks, but I'm in a bit of a hurry, if you don't mind."

"Oh, not at all. What can I do you for?"

"Well, the marriage was a bit impromptu, and I was unable, at the time, to give her the kind of ring she deserves. So, I've come to you to find one that comes as close to her beauty as possible. And if it'll help . . . "

I pulled a holo-projector from my belt and pushed the activation button. A blue cone of light popped up and a transparent image of Padmé appeared and rotated. I let Donick ponder the image a few moments and was very glad when his eyes lit up. "I have just the thing for Madam Skywalker. Come, follow me."

He led me past his public display cases, through a hidden door into a room lit only by a small blue orb hanging near the ceiling. Donick pulled a disk-like, grooved metallic object from the inner pocket of his brown sleeveless cloak and fingered it as he waddled to a small table in the furthest corner. He removed a dark, dusty piece of fabric covering a collection of boxes of varying shapes and sizes. Each of them had circular grooves on the lid. He considered them individually, eventually picking one up and putting the round key into the grooves on the box. He turned the key and there was a faint click. He opened the box and looked inside. Nodding, he led me back out into the main store and brighter light. Opening the box, he let me see the contents.

I beheld a beautiful piece of jewelry. The golden ring inside housed a sparkling, opaque white stone that glimmered with traces of different colors when moved in the light. The thin gold pieces that held the stone in place twisted and vined themselves around the white orb. 

"It's beyond beautiful," I breathed.

"It's made of an ancient stone, all but gone from every corner of the galaxy. This is the last piece of it in existence, at least to my knowledge. It's called opal."

I looked up from the ring and asked, "How much? I'll pay any price."

He smiled slightly, putting a hand gently on my shoulder. "For a long-time friend, to whom I owe my life, no charge."

I shook my head adamantly. "No, I demand to pay for it. I wouldn't feel right not paying for it."

"All right then. Two Republic credits. I hope you have two beautiful children. But with the combination of you and your missus, there's no doubt that they will be beautiful." He smiled slyly.

I smiled and agreed. I knew he wouldn't take anything more, not that I had much more on my person. I handed the credits over to him as he placed the box lovingly into my hand, the key still in the top. 

"The box will only open if the key is in place. It is virtually indestructible. Not even the blade of a lightsaber will open it."

I whistled quietly, truly impressed. There were few known materials that lightsabers could not penetrate.

"Take good care of it, my friend, and that lovely wife of yours. I wish you the best."

"Thanks, Donick. May the Force be with you."

I pocketed the ring box and exited the building. Hurrying through the streets back toward the apartment, I smiled despite myself. _She is going to love this._

I climbed back up to the balcony and peeked over. Padmé had obviously gotten back just after I had left because the lights were out and her soft form filled the right half of the bed, facing the wall. I could tell that she was freshly showered by her still-damp hair. She breathed slowly, obviously asleep. _Poor Padmé. That Senate meeting must have been a real killer. She couldn't even stay awake to wait for me._ I smiled lovingly and pulled myself up over the rails and onto the balcony. The white curtains that framed the open doors billowed softly in the wind. 

I walked through the doorway and stripped down to my trousers, ring box in hand. Careful not to wake her yet, I lay down beside her, putting the box temporarily on the nightstand. I leaned over her back and brushed some loose tendrils of hair back behind her ear. I bent down and kissed her cheek, putting my arm around her. She stirred, stretched a little, and turned her head around, looking sleepily at me. She smiled and positioned herself onto her right side facing me, propping her head on her hand. 

"Nice of you to join me."

I caressed her cheek and leaned in for a kiss, then I propped myself up on my left elbow. "Sorry I was late, but I'm sure you won't mind at all once you see why."

I reached behind me and picked the box up off of the nightstand. Turning back to her, I placed the box in between us on the bed, gestured toward it, and said, "Go ahead, open it."

She looked at me in surprise and picked up the dark container. With the box in hand, she turned the key and opened the lid. When she saw the ring, her mouth appeared as if a whole planet could fit comfortably inside. She looked up at me, deep brown eyes shining. "Oh, Ani! How did you . . . where in the world . . . ?" She couldn't get out a full sentence.

I took the box from her hand and pulled out the ring. Removing her plain band, I gently placed the opal on her finger. I leaned down to kiss it and looked up at her. "Thank you, Padmé, for always being there for me; when I first left Tatooine and the only life I ever knew; when Qui-Gon, to whom I looked up as a father, died; when my mother died. You have always been there." I took her hands in mine, pulled her closer, and looked deeply into her eyes, a tear starting to form in my own. "Please, my lovely, lovely Padmé, never leave me."

She wiped away the solitary tear that had fallen from my eye and kissed my forehead, my cheeks, my lips. Holding my face gently, she touched her forehead to mine, saying, "Ani, for as a long as I live, I will always, _always_ be there for you. My love for you will never change, come what may. I swear to you, Anakin, I will love you, until the end of time."

I couldn't hold in the cascade of tears any longer. She reached out her arms and held me while I cried into her nightgown. I knew in my heart that she meant every single word she said. No matter what happened, she would always love me, and I would always love her. All the suns in the galaxy could go black, fire could rain down from the skies, stars could collide, but nothing could change my love for her.

I don't know how long I cried, but by the time I could cry no longer, Padmé's shoulder and arm was saturated. 

After a few minutes, I told Padmé about what had happened with Obi-Wan and about his finding out about the marriage.

"Well, I'm so glad that he knows now. I know how hard it was for you to keep something so big from him, being as close as you two are."

"Yeah," I said, situating myself underneath the covers and lying back. Padmé laid her head on my chest and sighed. I put my arm around her and closed my eyes. I could feel that she was troubled, obviously by what had happened at the Senate meeting. I knew that if she wanted to tell me, she would have already. 

I tapped into the Force and sent Padmé an image of a beautiful meadow beside a waterfall, the sun shining in the cloudless blue sky. Her tension immediately started to ease. I sent her the image of a scruffy-looking, dirty-blonde haired little boy running through the meadow towards a teenage girl with long, braided brown hair, both dressed in simple pleasant clothes. When the two were almost upon each other, the boy slipped and fell on his face. When he looked up, his face was grass-stained and dirty, but he wasn't a little boy anymore; he was a young man of twenty. The girl came to help him up, but she wasn't a girl anymore; she wore a blinding white gown that flowed beautifully, a golden rope tied around her waist. Her hair shone in the sun, as did the iridescent wings that held her floating in the air. The glow of a halo floated above her head. The young man looked up at her face and said, "I knew you were an angel."

Padmé opened her eyes and looked up at me, smiling. She settled back down and fell gently to sleep, all her tension forgotten. I lay there and watched her sleep. She looked so beautiful, so fragile. I felt a fluttering in my chest and knew that I would risk everything to protect her, to keep her from ever hurting. 

"Padmé," I said softly to her sleeping form, "I won't ever let you go. I won't let any pain come to you. I'll protect you with my life."


	5. Night Thoughts

After a while, I gently lifted her off of me, got up, and walked to the balcony. I couldn't seem to fall asleep. The night air in my lungs, my face, and my hair felt so good. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. Then a soft voice, floating on the wind, singing a hauntingly beautiful melody with no words, reached my ears. I had never sung a note in my life, but all of a sudden, a song rose from my lips.

_My gift is my song, and this one's for you_

You can tell everybody that this is your song

It may be quite simple but now that it's done

Hope you don't mind, 

I hope you don't mind, 

That I put down in words

How wonderful life is, 

Now you're in the world

I stopped and opened my eyes abruptly. "Where did _that _come from?" I asked. The voice that had come from my lips could not have been my own. "I can't sing. I couldn't carry a note with a handle, yet . . . that was beautiful." I hurried inside and recorded the words I had sung. I'd tell Obi-Wan in the morning.

I returned to the balcony and looked out at the night sky. This was a rare Coruscant night where you could actually see the stars. I recalled a conversation Qui-Gon and I had had on Tatooine. . . .

_Darkness cloaked Mos Espa in deepening layers as night descended. Anakin Skywalker sat quietly on the balcony rail of his back porch while Qui-Gon studied a deep cut in the boy's arm. Anakin had sustained the cut sometime during the afternoon's prep work on the Podracer, and in typical boy fashion, he hadn't even noticed it until now._

Anakin gave the injury a cursory glance as the Jedi prepared to clean it, then leaned back to look up at the blanket of stars in the sky.

_"Sit still, Ani," Qui-Gon instructed._

The boy barely heard him. "There are so many! Do they all have a system of planets?"

"Most of them." Qui-Gon produced a clean piece of cloth.

"Has anyone been to all of them?"

Qui-Gon laughed. "Not likely."

Anakin nodded, still looking up. "I want to be the first one then, the first to see them all."

I felt a painful sting at the memory of Qui-Gon. It had been a long time since I had thought of him. Another memory entered my mind . . .

_Anakin Skywalker stood with Obi-Wan, his young face intense as he fought to hold back his tears._

A long, sustained drum roll traced the passage of the flames as they reduced Qui-Gon to spirit and ash. When the fire had taken him away, a flight of snowy doves was released into a crimson sunset. The birds rose in a flutter of wings and a splash of pale brilliance, winging softly away.

(. . .)

(Obi-Wan) looked down at Anakin. The boy was staring at the ashes on the funeral bier, crying softly.

He put his hand on one slim shoulder. "He is one with the Force, Anakin. You must let him go."

The boy shook his head. "I miss him."

Obi-Wan nodded. "I miss him, too, and I will remember him always. But he is gone."

Anakin wiped the tears from his face. "What will happen to me now?"

The hand tightened on the boy's shoulder. "I will train you, just as Qui-Gon would have done," Obi-Wan Kenobi said softly. "I am your new Master, Anakin. You will study with me, and you will become a Jedi Knight, I promise you."

A tear rolled down my cheek. "He's making good on his promise, Qui-Gon. You instructed a good man. I can only hope to be half as good a man as either of you." I felt anger welling up inside at the loss of Qui-Gon and the loss of my mother -- twice. I hated those who had taken them away from me; I hated the Sith and the Tusken Raiders with a deep passion. I looked up at the sky, a fire of revenge burning in my eyes.


	6. Palpatine

The next morning, I awoke very early. Being careful not to awaken Padmé, I rolled out of bed and got dressed. I kissed her cheek, then climbed down the side of the building. I hurried over to the Temple, the early morning air riffling through my mussed-up hair. I went up to Obi-Wan's quarters and found that he was still asleep. 

"Anakin," he said when he saw that it was I who had woken him up, "what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry I woke you, Master, but I just wanted to tell you something strange that happened last night."

"Come in, come in, Young One."

"Well," I started, following Obi-Wan to a couple of chairs, "last night, I was standing out on the balcony after Padmé had gone to sleep. I was feeling the night air on my face and I heard a faint voice on the wind. It was singing a haunting melody, and all of a sudden, I just burst into song. Except, it couldn't have been my voice because it was so beautiful, as were the words."

"What was it you sang?"

I sang it for him, proving to him that I could not sing. 

"You're right," he said, "that is beautiful. I cannot explain what it was." He paused to ponder the thought for a moment, then looked back to me. "While I am thinking about it, would you like me to finish the story I started yesterday?"

I nodded.

"All right. Well, I gestured that Kaya should sit down on the bed, so she did and gave me a questioning look. All of a sudden, I burst into song. Oddly enough, Padawan, it was the same song you just sang to me. I think that the Force sent you what I had sung so long ago. I can think of no other explanation. But getting back to the story . . .

"She started to talk again, but I could restrain myself no longer; I sat down and leaned in to kiss her passionately. I tingled all over with the feeling of being so close to such an attractive woman and also because this was my first kiss. She pushed me away after a few moments, looked at me with an incredulous look in her eye, and said, 'What are you doing, you strange man? Did you think that I was attracted to you? The only reason I came with you was because I thought I was in danger. I cannot believe you thought that I . . . '

"Her emotions got the best of her and she screamed. I tried to quiet her, but the guard was there in moments and asked what was going on. Running behind the large, dark human for protection, she said, 'This man tried to have his way with me!'

"The guard looked at my wardrobe and hair and said, 'Come on, Jedi,' pulling me up from the bed by my braid. He dragged me back to Qui-Gon and my dwelling and told my Master the story as he had seen it. I was looking down at the floor the whole time, but I could feel Qui-Gon's glares at me. When the guard left, he told me to sit down and lectured me as calmly as he could manage.

" 'Obi-Wan, what was going through your head? How could you make such advances on a woman? Obi-Wan, I . . . I cannot talk to you right now. I am afraid of what I might say, and I do not want to say something that I will regret. Just go to sleep and think about what you have done. Maybe you will realize the reason that Jedi are forbidden to have personal attachments.'

"He walked back to his bed, turned off the light, and went to sleep. I sat awake for a while, angry at myself for not controlling my emotions like I knew I could have. I vowed to myself and to the sleeping Qui-Gon that I would never again let my emotions get the better of me. I am glad to say that I have never fallen in love again, nor made any advances on a woman, but my emotions have gotten the better of me in other ways, as you saw yesterday. So, that was the first, and last, time I fell in love."

"That's a sad story, Master. I am sorry you had such a bad experience with love."

"So am I, Padawan. So am I." His eyes stared into nothingness. After a few moments, he snapped back and looked at me, smiling. "Well, I must be getting ready," he said, getting up from his chair. 

I followed suit. "Yes, Master. I will leave you alone."

I left Obi-Wan's room and wandered down the hall, thinking deeply about the memories that had come to me last night; I began getting angry once again. I did not see the man in front of me until I ran straight into him, causing him to drop the stack of durasheet he had been carrying. I instinctively knelt down, apologizing for my clumsiness, picking up the papers, without even looking at who it was.

"Why, young Skywalker, I was just about to go find you. I have something I want to discuss."

I looked up at hearing the familiarly smooth voice and into the face of Supreme Chancellor Palpatine. 

"Supreme Chancellor," I said in recognition, awkwardly attempting a bow while bending over, and failing.

He smiled, his pronounced nose flaring slightly, and he held out his hand to help me up. Once at my full height, which was a few inches taller than he was, I handed him the durasheet he had dropped. He put his free hand around my shoulders and led me down the hall, as if we were old friends.

Over the years, we had become more than acquaintances, but I would not have considered us "friends," in the sense of the word. He was the leader of the entire Republic and I was but a Padawan learner. He often took time to ask me into his office to discuss trivial things, as well as a serious matter or two every now and then. It was nice that this powerful man paid such attention to me, but occasionally I had a slight sense of foreboding when I was sitting in his grand office. I usually thought nothing of it and continued listening intently.

Once inside Palpatine's office, he sent the guards out, which he did when he wanted to talk about something serious. I sat down as he put the papers on a shelf behind me as he came around and sat behind his desk as usual. Steepling his fingers, he looked at me and began.

"Young Skywalker, I want to discuss a matter of some importance with you. As you are aware, most people of power have a selection a personal aides who help them with certain things. For example, you know of the small band of handmaidens of Senator Amidala's." Was it the light, or did his eyes twinkle when he said that?

I nodded that yes, I knew.

"Well, I have recently had an opening in my small band of aides. The gentleman and I had . . . differing views on many serious matters, so I had to let him go. I wanted you to be the first one I offered the position to. With it comes power and perhaps a little money. As time goes on, you will undoubtedly receive more money and power.

"You would still be able to train at the Jedi Temple, of course," he added, answering my paramount unspoken concern. "However, you will be spending the majority of your time away from training with me, and we will be getting personal with each other. I want us to be as open and honest as possible. If you are open with me, I will be open with you.

"So," he said, leaning over his desk, "what do you say?"

"Well, Supreme Chancellor -- "

"Please, my boy. Call me 'Palpatine.' "

"Palpatine . . . " It felt odd to address him so informally, but he did insist. "It's quite an offer."

"You don't have to answer right now, of course."

"Oh, it's not a question of whether I want the position or not. It would be an honor."

He stood up beaming. "Good! Good!" He came around his desk and clasped my hands in his and shook, as if sealing my fate. "When would you like to start?"  
"Would tomorrow be all right? I'd have to run this by my Master."

"Er . . . " he said, shifting as if uncomfortable and glancing away. "I'd rather you keep this quiet for now. I don't want people to know about my personal aides. There are so many lifeforms out there who resist the Republic and my leadership. I don't want to put your life in danger. There is no telling what they would do if they knew you worked so closely with me. You understand my concern."

"Of course, Supr-- . . . Palpatine. I won't tell Obi-Wan. But how will I explain being with you so much?"

"I'll handle that," he said in a deeper, quieter voice than any voice I had previously heard him use. 

He had not yet let go of my hands.


	7. Confrontations

Over the next two years, Palpatine and I steadily grew into a close relationship. In the beginning, I was called into his office once a week, and he asked me about my boyhood on Tatooine, my love of Podracing, my skill at fixing things. He carefully avoided the subject of my mother or anything else that would cause me pain to look back on.

During one of those meetings, there was a knock at the door.

A young guard stuck his head in the door and said, "Excellency, I thought you would like to know that Count Dooku has been found dead on the planet Neimoidia. He was apparently there for something having to do with the Trade Federation and/or the Separatist movement. He was killed by a lightsaber wound to his chest some time ago and found with this." The guard produced Dooku's crooked lightsaber.

Palpatine waved the guard off. "Thank you, Ozzel. Set it right there on the bench."

Ozzel complied, nodded, and closed the door. I looked at Palpatine and said, "Dooku's dead? I wonder who killed him."

Palpatine nodded, and we continued our conversation.

As time wore on, I was called into his office two to three times a week, or even as often as four to five times, when I wasn't on a mission to some other planet or in training. As I began to trust him more and more, he started to ask questions about my mother. More often than not, I began to get angry at the thought of her. He would sit in the chair next to me and tell me that it was all right to let all my emotions out, to cry and yell and even beat up some of the cushions from the benches against the wall, imaging they were the Tusken Raiders. No matter how angry I got, he encouraged me to let all the fury out, not to meditate and center myself with the Force, as I had been taught by the Jedi.

Of course, I didn't see the change in my demeanor, but those closest to me did.

One night, about a year and a half since the start of my frequent meetings with Palpatine, Padmé asked, "What's been happening to you, Ani?"

We were cuddled together under a blanket on a couch, watching the fire in the hearth die. I was holding her from behind, gazing into the flames, a reminder to me of seeing Qui-Gon's body burn on the funeral pyre.

I looked down at her. "What do you mean, love?"

She sat up and gently pushed my arms from around her, causing me to sit up also.

"Well, you've been becoming aloof and closed off from me for well over a year. And you seem -- I don't know how to describe it -- darker, I guess is the word. And you have been staying late more often, completely skipping coming over here. Where have you been going anyway? And what were you doing?"

I resented all the questions and accusations she was making, and I told her so. "How is where I've been going and what I've been doing any concern of yours?"

"Ani, I'm your wife. I'm just worried about you, is all. I love -- "

I stood up, anger starting to build. "If you loved me, you'd trust me."

She stood up, too. "I _do_ trust you," she started, then she gave up, sighing resignedly. "I don't want to get into a fight tonight, not tonight."

"Why? What significance does tonight have?"

She looked up at me, pain evident in her eyes. "You really don't remember, do you?"

When I made no attempt to show that I did remember, a tear formed in her eye.

"Tonight is our two year wedding anniversary." The tear fell down her cheek, and she promptly turned and ran to the bedroom, locking the door.

I looked at the closed door for a good five minutes before I sat down, putting my head in my hands. _She's right. I _have _been changing. I would never have gotten angry at her over her worrying about me. What is _wrong_ with you, Anakin? How can you just sit here while she's in this kind of pain, which _you_ caused. Get up, go in there and comfort her. Apologize for your insensitivity. Be a man and fix this problem._

I got up and walked to the door. Inside, I could hear muffled sobs. I knocked tentatively, and, getting no response, I used the Force to open the door and stepped inside.

She was curled up on the bed, her head buried in a pile of pillows, sobbing. She looked up at hearing me enter, piercing me with the look of pure anguish in her soft brown eyes. I walked over and sat cautiously beside her. She didn't break eye contact for a while, didn't move a muscle. All of a sudden, she threw herself into my arms and started crying again. I held her tight, smoothing her hair back, kissing the top of her head.

"I'm so sorry, Padmé. Shh. Please stop crying." I talked quietly while she cried. Finally, the sobbing ceased, and she looked up, holding my arms with her hands. She studied my eyes, as if to see if I was truly contrite. She must have been satisfied with what she found, because she leaned in slowly for a gentle kiss. 

Pulling back a bit, she said, "Ani, I love you so much. You know that, right?"

I nodded. "Truly and deeply."

She smiled and kissed me again, more passionately than before. In one seemless action, she pushed me down onto my back and pulled the sheet over us.

***

A few days later, Obi-Wan also asked about the change in me.

"What do you mean, Master?"

We were walking through the Temple gardens after a tense episode with a crazy Twi'lek who had had many thermal detonators strapped to his chest and threatened to set them off if the Jedi didn't do as he said. (He was apprehended and taken to a mental institution.) Obi-Wan stopped in front of a bench and gestured that we should sit down.

"I mean that you have been quiet and detached, and I sense a difference in you. We don't talk like we used to."

I thought back to the night with Padmé and vowed I that wouldn't snap like I had then. I knew that I could no longer hide it from Obi-Wan, so I told him about the meetings with Palpatine.

"And how long have you been having these meetings?"

"About two years."

"What do you talk about?"

"Sometimes about small stuff, sometimes about my mother."

"Your mother?" He furrowed his eyebrows. "Why would he want to know about your mother?"

"I don't know, Master. He said that he wants himself and his personal aides to be as open and honest as possible."

"Have you met any of these other _personal aides_?"

"Well, now that I think about it, no, I haven't. I sort of figured that we weren't supposed to know their identities so that we would not be able to give them up."

"Give them up?"

"If some dissidents to the Republic got a hold of us and tortured us, demanding information about Palpatine. He said that's why I could not tell anyone sooner. He wanted to protect me."

Obi-Wan scratched his whiskered chin and knitted his eyebrows even deeper. "Something in that whole set-up is not right; I can feel it." He looked back at me. "Do you think you could get out of the position?"

"Oh no, Master. He and I have grown so close. I couldn't let him down."

He put his arm around my shoulders, and we stood up. "All I can say, Padawan, is to proceed with caution. I don't like the sound of what's going on, but I feel you can handle yourself. I trust you."

We continued our walk, moving on to different subjects. 

***

About a month after the confrontations with Padmé and Obi-Wan, Palpatine called me into his office. He welcomed me like usual, ushering me from the door to my chair. We sat down and he offered me a drink, which I declined. Then he started business after telling the guards to leave.

"Anakin, I have need for a Jedi escort to Neimoidia. I have told the Jedi High Council that I have a secret mission, but I did not tell them where. The only people that know are you, the pilot, and I. Would you be interested?"

"Yes, I would. How long would we be gone?"

"Oh, probably no more than a week. Don't worry. I have sorted this out with the Council and your master. You have their permission. We will be leaving early tomorrow morning. Be ready. I will send a guard to retrieve you at 6:00, Standard Time, sharp."

"Yes, sir."

He stood and gestured me to do the same. "That's all I needed to talk about today." He came around and we shook hands good-bye. I went out the door and headed straight to Padmé's.

I told her that I would be gone for a week on a secret Jedi mission. She nodded and sat down on the bed, seemingly distracted.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" I asked, sitting beside her.

"I'm just worried." She looked at me, gently touching my cheek. "I'm not going to see you for a whole week."

"I have gone on missions longer than a week," I said, inching closer to her and running my hand through her hair. "You'll be all right without me."

"But I will be sick with worry not knowing where you are or why."

I put my arm around her waist and pulled her close, wrapping my other arm around her back. "Don't worry about me," I said in my quietest, most sensual voice. "I promised that I would never leave you a widow, and I am not about to break that promise." I caressed her back and kissed her neck.

I felt her heart start to beat rapidly. She pulled the belt from around my waist and the tunic over my head while I kicked my boots off. I put my arm around her as she pulled me down next to her and kissed me. 

"Anakin," she said breathlessly, looking into my eyes, "let's make this night one to remember."

I used the Force to dim the lights, ignite a few candles, and open the balcony doors for some cool air. I pulled off my undershirt and pulled her close. 

"As you wish, my lovely wife," I said, kissing her deeply.

***

Early the next morning, I awoke and sat on the edge of the bed. I smiled as I saw the scattering of clothes on the floor and the sleeping form of Padmé in the bed. I stood up and dressed; then I leaned over and kissed her cheek, her neck, her bare shoulder. I touched her cheek with the back of my hand, inadvertently waking her up. She turned over, propping herself up on her elbow.

"You're leaving so soon?" She sat up, keeping the sheet over her bosom.

"Yeah. Palpatine is expecting me at 6." I leaned in and kissed her. "I will see you in a week."

I started to stand up and walk toward the balcony, but Padmé grabbed my cloak and pulled me across the end of the bed onto my back. She crawled over, wrapping the sheet around her, and leaned over me.

"What are you doing? I have to go. I can't be la-- "

She put her index finger over my mouth to silence me, then removed her finger as she kissed me. 

"Baby, as much as I would _love_ to stay here with you, I must go. I cannot let Palpatine down. I promise, we will continue this when I get back."

She put on a pouty face and let me go. "Okay. Be careful."

"I will. See you in a week." I blew her a kiss as I let myself over the edge of the balcony, admiring her beauty. She was still sitting on the bed, holding the sheet up with one hand, the other supporting her, her legs tucked behind her. As soon as she was out of my sight, I had a strange feeling, as if I would never see her again. I just shook it off as nerves and continued my descent.

When I reached my quarters, I did not have long to wait. Within a few minutes, there was a knock at my door, which I answered.

"Sir, the Supreme Chancellor is expecting you," said the guard I recognized as Ozzel. He seemed to have an arrogant air about him, and I did not appreciate his neglecting to offer to help with my bags. 

I followed him to Palpatine's awaiting silver ship. After he met me at the hangar, Palpatine led me aboard and showed me where to put my things. We made ourselves comfortable, sprawling out on a couple of sofas in a nice, cozy cabin. 

We both pulled out a data-reader and relaxed. I noticed that Palpatine kept making funny little noises every now and then while staring at the screen. He seemed to be very excited at whatever it was he was looking at and he could not contain it at times. 

After about thirty minutes, he stretched and said, "I have to use the little Supreme Chancellor's room. I will be right back, Anakin."

I looked up from my reader briefly, nodding. When the door had slid closed, I waited a few moments and snuck over to see what was on the screen. I saw what appeared to be blueprints for a large, spherical battle station. I didn't get to see much more than that, because I heard Palpatine whistling just outside in the hall. I quickly set it back down and threw myself back onto my sofa, picking my reader back up and engrossing myself in how to repair a damaged verbobrain in a PK droid. Palpatine entered the room, sat back down, and returned to his reader, chuckling quietly almost immediately. After a few minutes, he suddenly broke the silence.

"I know that you looked at my reader while I was gone, Anakin."

I looked up, sort of embarrassed. "You do?"

"Why, yes. I left so that you _would _look at it. I knew you would be curious."

"Well, I only got a glance of a space station that looks like a moon. What is it for?"

He looked at me slyly. "You will find out soon enough, once we reach our destination."

I shrugged and returned to my reader.

***

"Sir, the planet is in range. We will be landing shortly." The pilot's voice over the intercom system broke the silence in the ship.

Palpatine stood up and stretched slightly. "Well, my boy, appears as if we should be gathering our things."

I nodded and followed him out the door to gather our travel bags and wait by the ship's exit hatch. 

The ship landed and the hatch opened. The humid air hit me, taking away my breath momentarily. When I looked out into the dark, dreary landscape, I instinctively asked, "Why are we here?"

He laughed, clapping my shoulder, and led me down the rampway as it connected with the planet's slimy surface. As I followed Palpatine through the swampland, I was disturbed by the quiet. There seemed to be nothing else alive on the entire planet. 

Palpatine led me deeper and deeper into the landscape. After what seemed an hour of walking, I saw a small, drab, hut-like building appear before us. It seemed that this is where he was taking me. He punched in an entry code, and the door slid open to reveal a vast, elaborate interior. 

When he saw the look on incredulity on my face, he smiled and said, "New technology. There is actually much more room in this building, many more storeys, than the exterior shows. Come," he said, leading me down a long, dimly lit corridor. 

The decor of the building was that of royalty, though it was vastly under-lit and dark. There was a bit of a sinister air to it. I felt that something was wrong, though I didn't know what. However, I trusted Palpatine, so I followed him. He finally stopped at the end of the corridor before a pair of large doors, pulling the glove off of his right hand and putting it against a red-lit screen beside one of the doors. The red light flashed up and down and turned to green. The doors started to clank and whir, then part. 

The interior of the room was pitch black, so I could see nothing. I saw Palpatine enter, so I followed as closely as possible. Then, what felt to be about halfway into the room, I felt him come to a stop. He put a hand on my shoulder, saying, "Stay here" and continued walking forward, until I could sense him no longer. 

I stood in the darkness, trying desperately to feel what was in the room. Something was blocking my Force-sensitivity, so I could feel nothing. It was then I started to feel afraid. But, as soon as I started to feel afraid, I felt better, as if I _should_ have been feeling afraid. As if responding to this realization, the room started to illuminate, but with a dark illumination. I looked around and saw that I was standing in what appeared to be a large throne room. Before me, sitting on a grand chair that was hovering just above the ground, was a man in a hooded black cloak. His eyes were shrouded by the shadows of the hood, but I knew who it was.

_Palpatine . . ._

The man let out a deep, raspy chuckle and steepled his long, knobby fingers before his face, elbows set on the armrests.

"That is but my other, less powerful identity. Many others call me 'Darth Sidious,' but you, my boy, shall come to know me as . . . " -- he lowered his head, leaned forward menacingly, and folded his fingers together, sending a cold gust in my direction -- "_Master._"

The realizations hit me all at once: this was the Dark Lord of the long-thought extinct Sith Order, and both Maul and Dooku had been his apprentices. Sidious had obviously killed Dooku himself and set his eyes upon me to take Dooku's place. The meetings we had been having had been slowly turning me to the Dark Side. He knew everything that was going on with the Republic and was obviously orchestrating an elaborate plan; every move, from the request for the clone army, to Queen Amidala's vote of "no confidence" in Chancellor Valorum, to Palpatine's being elected Supreme Chancellor, to Jar Jar's call to give emergency powers to the Supreme Chancellor, had been made according to his plan. This man was obviously very powerful, very dangerous, and very evil.

_This is a man worthy of my admiration_, I thought to myself.

Upon hearing my thought, a sinister smile curled at the corner of his mouth as he leaned back and steepled his fingers again. An image of a crying Padmé flashed through my mind as I knelt down on one knee, bowed my head, and said, "What is thy bidding, my master?"

"Rise, my friend. We have business to take care of," he said, rising from his chair.

***

"The only way to be truly powerful," Sidious was saying during one of our many sessions during that week in Neimoidia, "is to give in to your anger, your hate. You want to be truly powerful, don't you, my young apprentice?"

"More than anything in the galaxy." A flicker of hesitation flashed through my mind. _Except to be with Padmé . . ._

Sidious rebuked me sharply, "A Sith has no room for _love_." He said the word mockingly. "If any vulnerability is evident in you, it could be exploited and would be your death. Sith Lords do not _love_! Do you understand!?"

I nodded sullenly. "Yes, Master."

"Now, do you want to be truly powerful?"

"Yes."

"Then you must give up everything, every tie to your former life, and become mine. Only by turning wholly to the Dark Side will you be above anything that can bring you down, will you be capable of destroying entire planets with a flick of your wrist, will you be the 'most powerful Jedi ever.' Now, is this what you truly want 'more than anything in the galaxy,' or some _woman_ who will only bring you down, cause you pain, make you _weak_!?"

I could stand it no longer. I stood up in a fury and screamed, "_I love Padmé and _no_ one will take me away from her!!_"

I ran from the room, from the hut, and deep into the forest. I ran and ran, my legs pumping like the wind, my face burning with the tears streaming down my face. My only thought was Padmé, of my last vision of her: sitting on the bed after our night of pure passion, gazing at me, knowing she'd be without me for a week, but not knowing that I would be tempted by the Dark Side. 

I ran until I could run no more, finally collapsing, resting my forehead on the muddy earth, and crying. I honestly didn't know what I should do. I wanted desperately to be as powerful as Palpatine was promising, but I loved Padmé with every fiber of my being. I couldn't leave her. I had vowed my life to her, and I loved her more than life itself. I could never leave her like that.

_Palpatine . . ._ The memory of his cold voice cut through me. I lifted my head, tears stopping abruptly. I could feel him coming nearer._ Get away from me, you monster. You will never take me alive. You can't destroy what Padmé and I have. You could lay the entire galaxy at my feet, but I will _never_ sacrifice my only love, my reason for living and breathing, my angel._

The anger was building inside me despite my desperate attempts to control it. I stood, seeing the cloaked figure coming steadily closer. I eyed him through narrow slits, my eyes piercing blue orbs, while I fingered the lightsaber still hanging at my side.

When he was about twenty feet away, I detached the lightsber and pushed the activation button, causing the blue blade of the lightsaber to extend from the silver hilt. I held perfectly still as he slowly continued advancing.

Just out of my attack range, he stopped and shook his head, _tsk_ing. 

"Anakin, Anakin, Anakin. I thought you knew better. If you engage me in battle now and kill me, your path to the Dark Side will be complete. And I will be more powerful than you could ever imagine."

His words had no affect on me. "Don't take another step, Palpatine. I'll slice you in two. You don't scare me."

He chuckled. "_I_ might not scare you, Skywalker, but I know what does. You see this comlink?" He pulled a metallic object from the folds of his robes and waved it around. "With a push of a button, I can call my agents on Coruscant and command them to kill your precious _Padmé_ and make it look like a freak accident. Who do you think people will believe: the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Senate of the Republic or a lowly Padawan learner?"

Pure horror spread across my face. I loosened my grip on the lightsaber, and in the same instant, Palpatine pulled it from my grasp through the Force as it was deactivated. "Anakin," he whispered, advancing to within a foot of me. "Anakin, think about the power! How can you resist such power? I know how badly you want it, and I am capable of giving it to you. Give yourself to me."

I wavered between my two choices. _I deserve this_, I thought finally._ They all knew this would come. I deserve to be powerful, more powerful than they could imagine. I _deserve_ this!_

I fell to my knees before Palpatine. "Oh, Master, I'm sorry. Forgive me!"

"Rise, my young apprentice. All is forgotten." He pulled me to my feet and handed me the lightsaber. As he led me back to the hut, he said, "We are leaving the planet tomorrow. Once back on Coruscant, you will go to Kenobi and telling him you are no longer his Padawan. Then you will move in to quarters I will have arranged for you and undergo many more sessions with me. Is this clear?"

"Yes, Master."

While he continued to talk, I thought in the very back of my mind, _How will I tell Padmé_?


	8. The Real Palpatine

Over the next two years, Palpatine and I steadily grew into a close relationship. In the beginning, I was called into his office once a week, and he asked me about my boyhood on Tatooine, my love of Podracing, my skill at fixing things. He carefully avoided the subject of my mother or anything else that would cause me pain to look back on.

During one of those meetings, there was a knock at the door.

A young guard stuck his head in the door and said, "Excellency, I thought you would like to know that Count Dooku has been found dead on the planet Neimoidia. He was apparently there for something having to do with the Trade Federation and/or the Separatist movement. He was killed by a lightsaber wound to his chest some time ago and found with this." The guard produced Dooku's crooked lightsaber.

Palpatine waved the guard off. "Thank you, Ozzel. Set it right there on the bench."

Ozzel complied, nodded, and closed the door. I looked at Palpatine and said, "Dooku's dead? I wonder who killed him."

Palpatine nodded, and we continued our conversation.

As time wore on, I was called into his office two to three times a week, or even as often as four to five times, when I wasn't on a mission to some other planet or in training. As I began to trust him more and more, he started to ask questions about my mother. More often than not, I began to get angry at the thought of her. He would sit in the chair next to me and tell me that it was all right to let all my emotions out, to cry and yell and even beat up some of the cushions from the benches against the wall, imaging they were the Tusken Raiders. No matter how angry I got, he encouraged me to let all the fury out, not to meditate and center myself with the Force, as I had been taught by the Jedi.

Of course, I didn't see the change in my demeanor, but those closest to me did.

One night, about a year and a half since the start of my frequent meetings with Palpatine, Padmé asked, "What's been happening to you, Ani?"

We were cuddled together under a blanket on a couch, watching the fire in the hearth die. I was holding her from behind, gazing into the flames, a reminder to me of seeing Qui-Gon's body burn on the funeral pyre.

I looked down at her. "What do you mean, love?"

She sat up and gently pushed my arms from around her, causing me to sit up also.

"Well, you've been becoming aloof and closed off from me for well over a year. And you seem -- I don't know how to describe it -- darker, I guess is the word. And you have been staying late more often, completely skipping coming over here. Where have you been going anyway? And what were you doing?"

I resented all the questions and accusations she was making, and I told her so. "How is where I've been going and what I've been doing any concern of yours?"

"Ani, I'm your wife. I'm just worried about you, is all. I love -- "

I stood up, anger starting to build. "If you loved me, you'd trust me."

She stood up, too. "I _do_ trust you," she started, then she gave up, sighing resignedly. "I don't want to get into a fight tonight, not tonight."

"Why? What significance does tonight have?"

She looked up at me, pain evident in her eyes. "You really don't remember, do you?"

When I made no attempt to show that I did remember, a tear formed in her eye.

"Tonight is our two year wedding anniversary." The tear fell down her cheek, and she promptly turned and ran to the bedroom, locking the door.

I looked at the closed door for a good five minutes before I sat down, putting my head in my hands. _She's right. I _have _been changing. I would never have gotten angry at her over her worrying about me. What is _wrong_ with you, Anakin? How can you just sit here while she's in this kind of pain, which _you_ caused. Get up, go in there and comfort her. Apologize for your insensitivity. Be a man and fix this problem._

I got up and walked to the door. Inside, I could hear muffled sobs. I knocked tentatively, and, getting no response, I used the Force to open the door and stepped inside.

She was curled up on the bed, her head buried in a pile of pillows, sobbing. She looked up at hearing me enter, piercing me with the look of pure anguish in her soft brown eyes. I walked over and sat cautiously beside her. She didn't break eye contact for a while, didn't move a muscle. All of a sudden, she threw herself into my arms and started crying again. I held her tight, smoothing her hair back, kissing the top of her head.

"I'm so sorry, Padmé. Shh. Please stop crying." I talked quietly while she cried. Finally, the sobbing ceased, and she looked up, holding my arms with her hands. She studied my eyes, as if to see if I was truly contrite. She must have been satisfied with what she found, because she leaned in slowly for a gentle kiss. 

Pulling back a bit, she said, "Ani, I love you so much. You know that, right?"

I nodded. "Truly and deeply."

She smiled and kissed me again, more passionately than before. In one seemless action, she pushed me down onto my back and pulled the sheet over us.

***

A few days later, Obi-Wan also asked about the change in me.

"What do you mean, Master?"

We were walking through the Temple gardens after a tense episode with a crazy Twi'lek who had had many thermal detonators strapped to his chest and threatened to set them off if the Jedi didn't do as he said. (He was apprehended and taken to a mental institution.) Obi-Wan stopped in front of a bench and gestured that we should sit down.

"I mean that you have been quiet and detached, and I sense a difference in you. We don't talk like we used to."

I thought back to the night with Padmé and vowed I that wouldn't snap like I had then. I knew that I could no longer hide it from Obi-Wan, so I told him about the meetings with Palpatine.

"And how long have you been having these meetings?"

"About two years."

"What do you talk about?"

"Sometimes about small stuff, sometimes about my mother."

"Your mother?" He furrowed his eyebrows. "Why would he want to know about your mother?"

"I don't know, Master. He said that he wants himself and his personal aides to be as open and honest as possible."

"Have you met any of these other _personal aides_?"

"Well, now that I think about it, no, I haven't. I sort of figured that we weren't supposed to know their identities so that we would not be able to give them up."

"Give them up?"

"If some dissidents to the Republic got a hold of us and tortured us, demanding information about Palpatine. He said that's why I could not tell anyone sooner. He wanted to protect me."

Obi-Wan scratched his whiskered chin and knitted his eyebrows even deeper. "Something in that whole set-up is not right; I can feel it." He looked back at me. "Do you think you could get out of the position?"

"Oh no, Master. He and I have grown so close. I couldn't let him down."

He put his arm around my shoulders, and we stood up. "All I can say, Padawan, is to proceed with caution. I don't like the sound of what's going on, but I feel you can handle yourself. I trust you."

We continued our walk, moving on to different subjects. 

***

About a month after the confrontations with Padmé and Obi-Wan, Palpatine called me into his office. He welcomed me like usual, ushering me from the door to my chair. We sat down and he offered me a drink, which I declined. Then he started business after telling the guards to leave.

"Anakin, I have need for a Jedi escort to Neimoidia. I have told the Jedi High Council that I have a secret mission, but I did not tell them where. The only people that know are you, the pilot, and I. Would you be interested?"

"Yes, I would. How long would we be gone?"

"Oh, probably no more than a week. Don't worry. I have sorted this out with the Council and your master. You have their permission. We will be leaving early tomorrow morning. Be ready. I will send a guard to retrieve you at 6:00, Standard Time, sharp."

"Yes, sir."

He stood and gestured me to do the same. "That's all I needed to talk about today." He came around and we shook hands good-bye. I went out the door and headed straight to Padmé's.

I told her that I would be gone for a week on a secret Jedi mission. She nodded and sat down on the bed, seemingly distracted.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" I asked, sitting beside her.

"I'm just worried." She looked at me, gently touching my cheek. "I'm not going to see you for a whole week."

"I have gone on missions longer than a week," I said, inching closer to her and running my hand through her hair. "You'll be all right without me."

"But I will be sick with worry not knowing where you are or why."

I put my arm around her waist and pulled her close, wrapping my other arm around her back. "Don't worry about me," I said in my quietest, most sensual voice. "I promised that I would never leave you a widow, and I am not about to break that promise." I caressed her back and kissed her neck.

I felt her heart start to beat rapidly. She pulled the belt from around my waist and the tunic over my head while I kicked my boots off. I put my arm around her as she pulled me down next to her and kissed me. 

"Anakin," she said breathlessly, looking into my eyes, "let's make this night one to remember."

I used the Force to dim the lights, ignite a few candles, and open the balcony doors for some cool air. I pulled off my undershirt and pulled her close. 

"As you wish, my lovely wife," I said, kissing her deeply.

***

Early the next morning, I awoke and sat on the edge of the bed. I smiled as I saw the scattering of clothes on the floor and the sleeping form of Padmé in the bed. I stood up and dressed; then I leaned over and kissed her cheek, her neck, her bare shoulder. I touched her cheek with the back of my hand, inadvertently waking her up. She turned over, propping herself up on her elbow.

"You're leaving so soon?" She sat up, keeping the sheet over her bosom.

"Yeah. Palpatine is expecting me at 6." I leaned in and kissed her. "I will see you in a week."

I started to stand up and walk toward the balcony, but Padmé grabbed my cloak and pulled me across the end of the bed onto my back. She crawled over, wrapping the sheet around her, and leaned over me.

"What are you doing? I have to go. I can't be la-- "

She put her index finger over my mouth to silence me, then removed her finger as she kissed me. 

"Baby, as much as I would _love_ to stay here with you, I must go. I cannot let Palpatine down. I promise, we will continue this when I get back."

She put on a pouty face and let me go. "Okay. Be careful."

"I will. See you in a week." I blew her a kiss as I let myself over the edge of the balcony, admiring her beauty. She was still sitting on the bed, holding the sheet up with one hand, the other supporting her, her legs tucked behind her. As soon as she was out of my sight, I had a strange feeling, as if I would never see her again. I just shook it off as nerves and continued my descent.

When I reached my quarters, I did not have long to wait. Within a few minutes, there was a knock at my door, which I answered.

"Sir, the Supreme Chancellor is expecting you," said the guard I recognized as Ozzel. He seemed to have an arrogant air about him, and I did not appreciate his neglecting to offer to help with my bags. 

I followed him to Palpatine's awaiting silver ship. After he met me at the hangar, Palpatine led me aboard and showed me where to put my things. We made ourselves comfortable, sprawling out on a couple of sofas in a nice, cozy cabin. 

We both pulled out a data-reader and relaxed. I noticed that Palpatine kept making funny little noises every now and then while staring at the screen. He seemed to be very excited at whatever it was he was looking at and he could not contain it at times. 

After about thirty minutes, he stretched and said, "I have to use the little Supreme Chancellor's room. I will be right back, Anakin."

I looked up from my reader briefly, nodding. When the door had slid closed, I waited a few moments and sneaked over to see what was on the screen. I saw what appeared to be blueprints for a large, spherical battle station. I didn't get to see much more than that, because I heard Palpatine whistling just outside in the hall. I quickly set it back down and threw myself back onto my sofa, picking my reader back up and engrossing myself in how to repair a damaged verbobrain in a PK droid. Palpatine entered the room, sat back down, and returned to his reader, chuckling quietly almost immediately. After a few minutes, he suddenly broke the silence.

"I know that you looked at my reader while I was gone, Anakin."

I looked up, sort of embarrassed. "You do?"

"Why, yes. I left so that you _would _look at it. I knew you would be curious."

"Well, I only got a glance of a space station that looks like a moon. What is it for?"

He looked at me slyly. "You will find out soon enough, once we reach our destination."

I shrugged and returned to my reader.

***

"Sir, the planet is in range. We will be landing shortly." The pilot's voice over the intercom system broke the silence in the ship.

Palpatine stood up and stretched slightly. "Well, my boy, appears as if we should be gathering our things."

I nodded and followed him out the door to gather our travel bags and wait by the ship's exit hatch. 

The ship landed and the hatch opened. The humid air hit me, taking away my breath momentarily. When I looked out into the dark, dreary landscape, I instinctively asked, "Why are we here?"

He laughed, clapping my shoulder, and led me down the rampway as it connected with the planet's slimy surface. As I followed Palpatine through the swampland, I was disturbed by the quiet. There seemed to be nothing else alive on the entire planet. 

Palpatine led me deeper and deeper into the landscape. After what seemed an hour of walking, I saw a small, drab, hut-like building appear before us. It seemed that this is where he was taking me. He punched in an entry code, and the door slid open to reveal a vast, elaborate interior. 

When he saw the look on incredulity on my face, he smiled and said, "New technology. There is actually much more room in this building, many more storeys, than the exterior shows. Come," he said, leading me down a long, dimly lit corridor. 

The decor of the building was that of royalty, though it was vastly under-lit and dark. There was a bit of a sinister air to it. I felt that something was wrong, though I didn't know what. However, I trusted Palpatine, so I followed him. He finally stopped at the end of the corridor before a pair of large doors, pulling the glove off of his right hand and putting it against a red-lit screen beside one of the doors. The red light flashed up and down and turned to green. The doors started to clank and whir, then part. 

The interior of the room was pitch black, so I could see nothing. I saw Palpatine enter, so I followed as closely as possible. Then, what felt to be about halfway into the room, I felt him come to a stop. He put a hand on my shoulder, saying, "Stay here" and continued walking forward, until I could sense him no longer. 

I stood in the darkness, trying desperately to feel what was in the room. Something was blocking my Force-sensitivity, so I could feel nothing. It was then I started to feel afraid. But, as soon as I started to feel afraid, I felt better, as if I _should_ have been feeling afraid. As if responding to this realization, the room started to illuminate, but with a dark illumination. I looked around and saw that I was standing in what appeared to be a large throne room. Before me, sitting on a grand chair that was hovering just above the ground, was a man in a hooded black cloak. His eyes were shrouded by the shadows of the hood, but I knew who it was.

_Palpatine . . ._

The man let out a deep, raspy chuckle and steepled his long, knobby fingers before his face, elbows set on the armrests.

"That is but my other, less powerful identity. Many others call me 'Darth Sidious,' but you, my boy, shall come to know me as . . . " -- he lowered his head, leaned forward menacingly, and folded his fingers together, sending a cold gust in my direction -- "_Master._"

The realizations hit me all at once: this was the Dark Lord of the long-thought extinct Sith Order, and both Maul and Dooku had been his apprentices. Sidious had obviously killed Dooku himself and set his eyes upon me to take Dooku's place. The meetings we had been having had been slowly turning me to the Dark Side. He knew everything that was going on with the Republic and was obviously orchestrating an elaborate plan; every move, from the request for the clone army, to Queen Amidala's vote of "no confidence" in Chancellor Valorum, to Palpatine's being elected Supreme Chancellor, to Jar Jar's call to give emergency powers to the Supreme Chancellor, had been made according to his plan. This man was obviously very powerful, very dangerous, and very evil.

_This is a man worthy of my admiration_, I thought to myself.

Upon hearing my thought, a sinister smile curled at the corner of his mouth as he leaned back and steepled his fingers again. An image of a crying Padmé flashed through my mind as I knelt down on one knee, bowed my head, and said, "What is thy bidding, my master?"

"Rise, my friend. We have business to take care of," he said, rising from his chair.

***

"The only way to be truly powerful," Sidious was saying during one of our many sessions during that week in Neimoidia, "is to give in to your anger, your hate. You want to be truly powerful, don't you, my young apprentice?"

"More than anything in the galaxy." A flicker of hesitation flashed through my mind. _Except to be with Padmé . . ._

Sidious rebuked me sharply, "A Sith has no room for _love_." He said the word mockingly. "If any vulnerability is evident in you, it could be exploited and would be your death. Sith Lords do not _love_! Do you understand?"

I nodded sullenly. "Yes, Master."

"Now, do you want to be truly powerful?"

"Yes."

"Then you must give up everything, every tie to your former life, and become mine. Only by turning wholly to the Dark Side will you be above anything that can bring you down, will you be capable of destroying entire planets with a flick of your wrist, will you be the 'most powerful Jedi ever.' Now, is this what you truly want 'more than anything in the galaxy,' or some _woman_ who will only bring you down, cause you pain, make you _weak_!"

I could stand it no longer. I stood up in a fury and screamed, "_I love Padmé and _no_ one will take me away from her!_"

I ran from the room, from the hut, and deep into the forest. I ran and ran, my legs pumping like the wind, my face burning with the tears streaming down my face. My only thought was Padmé, of my last vision of her: sitting on the bed after our night of pure passion, gazing at me, knowing she'd be without me for a week, but not knowing that I would be tempted by the Dark Side. 

I ran until I could run no more, finally collapsing, resting my forehead on the muddy earth, and crying. I honestly didn't know what I should do. I wanted desperately to be as powerful as Palpatine was promising, but I loved Padmé with every fiber of my being. I couldn't leave her. I had vowed my life to her, and I loved her more than life itself. I could never leave her like that.

_Palpatine . . ._ The memory of his cold voice cut through me. I lifted my head, tears stopping abruptly. I could feel him coming nearer._ Get away from me, you monster. You will never take me alive. You can't destroy what Padmé and I have. You could lay the entire galaxy at my feet, but I will _never_ sacrifice my only love, my reason for living and breathing, my angel._

The anger was building inside me despite my desperate attempts to control it. I stood, seeing the cloaked figure coming steadily closer. I eyed him through narrow slits, my eyes piercing blue orbs, while I fingered the lightsaber still hanging at my side.

When he was about twenty feet away, I detached the lightsber and pushed the activation button, causing the blue blade of the lightsaber to extend from the silver hilt. I held perfectly still as he slowly continued advancing.

Just out of my attack range, he stopped and shook his head, _tsk_ing. 

"Anakin, Anakin, Anakin. I thought you knew better. If you engage me in battle now and kill me, your path to the Dark Side will be complete. And I will be more powerful than you could ever imagine."

His words had no affect on me. "Don't take another step, Palpatine. I'll slice you in two. You don't scare me."

He chuckled. "_I_ might not scare you, Skywalker, but I know what does. You see this comlink?" He pulled a metallic object from the folds of his robes and waved it around. "With a push of a button, I can call my agents on Coruscant and command them to kill your precious _Padmé_ and make it look like a freak accident. Whom do you think people will believe: the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Senate of the Republic or a lowly Padawan learner?"

Pure horror spread across my face. I loosened my grip on the lightsaber, and in the same instant, Palpatine pulled it from my grasp through the Force as it was deactivated. "Anakin," he whispered, advancing to within a foot of me. "Anakin, think about the power! How can you resist such power? I know how badly you want it, and I am capable of giving it to you. Give yourself to me."

I wavered between my two choices. _I deserve this_, I thought finally._ They all knew this would come. I deserve to be powerful, more powerful than they could imagine. I _deserve_ this!_

I fell to my knees before Palpatine. "Oh, Master, I'm sorry. Forgive me!"

"Rise, my young apprentice. All is forgotten." He pulled me to my feet and handed me the lightsaber. As he led me back to the hut, he said, "We are leaving the planet tomorrow. Once back on Coruscant, you will go to Kenobi and telling him you are no longer his Padawan. Then you will move in to quarters I will have arranged for you and undergo many more sessions with me. Is this clear?"

"Yes, Master."

While he continued to talk, I thought in the very back of my mind, _How will I tell Padmé_?


	9. Second Thoughts

"The only way to be truly powerful," Sidious was saying during on of our many sessions during that week in  
Neimoidia, "is to give in to your anger, your hate. You want to be truly powerful, don't you, my young apprentice?"  
  
"More than anything in the galaxy." A flicker of hesitation flashed through my mind. *Except to be with  
Padmé . . .*  
  
Sidious rebuked me sharply, "A Sith has no room for 'love.'" He said it mockingly. "If any vulnerability is  
evident in you, it could be exploited and would be your death. Sith Lords do not love! Do you understand!?"  
  
I nodded sullenly. "Yes, Master."  
  
"Now, do you want to be truly powerful?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Then you must give up everything, every tie to your former life, and become mine. Only by turning wholly  
to the Dark Side will you be above anything that can bring you down, will you be capable of destroying entire  
planets with a flick of your wrist, will you be the 'most powerful Jedi ever.' Now, is this what you truly want 'more  
than anything in the galaxy,' or some woman who will only bring you down, cause you pain, make you weak!?"  
  
I could stand it no longer. I stood up in a fury and screamed, "I love Padmé and no one will take me away  
from her!!"  
  
I ran from the room, from the hut, and deep into the forest. I ran and ran, my legs pumping like the wind,  
my face burning with the tears streaming down my face. My only thought was Padmé, of my last vision of her: sitting  
on the bed after our night of pure passion, gazing at me, knowing she'd be without me for a week, but not knowing  
that I would be tempted by the Dark Side.   
  
I ran until I could run no more, finally collapsing, resting my forehead on the muddy earth, crying. I  
honestly didn't know what I should do. I wanted desperately to be as powerful as Palpatine was promising, but I  
loved Padmé with every fiber of my being. I couldn't leave her. I had vowed my life to her, and I loved her more  
than life itself. I could never leave her like that.  
  
Palpatine . . . The memory of his cold voice cut through me. I lifted my head, tears stopping abruptly. I could  
feel him coming nearer. *Get away from me, you monster. You will never take me alive. You can't destroy what  
Padmé and I have. You could lay the entire galaxy at my feet, but I will never sacrifice my only love, my reason for  
living and breathing, my angel.*   
  
The anger was building inside me despite my desperate attempts to control it. I stood, seeing the cloaked  
figure coming steadily closer. I eyed him through narrow slits, my eyes piercing blue orbs, while I fingered the  
lightsaber still hanging at my side.  
  
When he was about twenty feet away, I detached the lightsber and pushed the activation button, causing the  
blue blade of the lightsaber to extend from the silver hilt, the only light in the darkness. I held perfectly still as he slowly continued advancing.  
  
Just out of my attack range, he stopped and shook his head, tsking.   
  
"Anakin, Anakin. I thought you knew better. If you engage me in battle now and kill me, your path to the  
Dark Side will be complete. And I will be more powerful than you could ever imagine."  
  
His words had no affect on me. "Don't take another step, Palpatine. I'll slice you in two. You don't scare  
me."  
  
He chuckled. "*I* might not scare you, Skywalker, but I know what does. You see this comlink?" He pulled a  
metallic object from the folds of his robes and waved it around. "With a push of a button, I can call my agents on  
Coruscant and command them to kill your precious Padmé and make it look like a freak accident. Who do you think  
people will believe: the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Senate of the Republic or a lowly Padawan learner?"  
  
Pure horror spread across my face. I loosened my grip on the lightsaber, and in the same instant, Palpatine  
pulled it from my grasp through the Force as it was deactivated. "Anakin," he whispered, advancing to within a foot  
of me. "Anakin, think about the power! How can you resist such power? I know how badly you want it, and I am  
capable of giving it to you. Give yourself to me."  
  
I wavered between my two choices. *I deserve this,* I thought finally. *They all knew this would come. I  
deserve to be powerful, more powerful than they could imagine. I deserve this!*  
  
I fell to my knees before Palpatine. "Oh, Master, I'm sorry. Forgive me!"  
  
"Rise, my young apprentice. All is forgotten." He pulled me to my feet and handed me the lightsaber. As he  
led me back to the hut, he said, "We are leaving the planet tomorrow. Once back on Coruscant, you will go to  
Kenobi and telling him you are no longer his Padawan. Then you will move in to quarters I will have arranged for  
you. You will undergo many more sessions with me. Is this clear?"  
  
"Yes, Master."  
  
While he continued to talk, I thought in the very back of my mind, *How will I tell Padmé?*  
  
***  
  
~~~  
"Ani . . ." A sweet voice calls my name.  
  
I search for the source of the voice. I see a sweet woman, hair pulled back in a knot at the nape of her neck,  
careworn face smiling sadly at me. Her simple, coarse clothing rustles gently in the breeze. Behind her, the twin  
suns set in near unison.  
  
One word comes to mind, but no sound will leave my lips. "Mother . . ."  
  
Her brown eyes have lost the twinkle I knew so well. I step forward to embrace her.   
  
She puts out her hands urgently, a look of terror covering her face.  
  
"No, Ani! You mustn't give in!"  
  
I stop and look around. At my feet, I see a huge chasm in the sandy earth. At the bottom stands Sidious,  
looking up, beckoning to me.  
  
"Join me, Anakin, and together we will rule to galaxy!"  
  
I look up to my mother. There is no way I can get to her without falling into the chasm.  
  
Her arms drop as she says, "Turn around, Ani, and don't look back once you do. Don't look back."  
  
I do as she says. Behind me is the loving face of Padmé. I look down cautiously; instead of a chasm, there  
is a path of golden light leading to her outspread arms. She brings one hand down to her stomach, looks up, and  
smiles at me. I gaze quizzically at her. I turn back to my mother. She smiles as the wind begins to blow harder. Her  
image starts to waver, becoming as of the sand itself, being swirled into the air. Her smile remains as the rest is  
scattered upon the winds, then eventually it's gone, too. I look back down to Sidious, back to Padmé.  
  
All of a sudden, a gust of strong wind pushes me backwards, into the chasm. I reach out for Padmé, whose  
eyes fall to her stomach again, tears streaming onto the ground, forming a red river of lava. Sidious' evil laughter  
fills my ears, reverberates against the walls of the chasm. I fall and fall for all eternity . . .  
~~~  
  
"NO!!!" I screamed as I sat up, breathing heavily. I looked around. *I must be on the ship going back to  
Coruscant.* I looked out the window of my cabin and saw stars streaming past. I took a deep breath and sat on the  
edge of my bed.  
  
A tentative knock on my door was followed by the smooth voice. "My boy, are you all right?"  
  
Palpatine . . . "Yes, I'm fine --" I forced myself to say it. "-- Master."  
  
"Good, we will be arriving on Coruscant shortly. I suggest you get up and be ready to land."  
  
I heard his clothing swishing down the corridor away from my cabin. I ran my hands through my sweaty  
hair and stood up. After I got dressed, I sat cross-legged on my bed and meditated, felt the Force flow through me.  
Several minutes later, I felt better than I had felt in a long time. I felt at peace with myself. There was absolutely no  
question in my mind about the choice I was going to make.  
  
"Anakin!" he yelled.  
  
I smiled as I replied, "Coming, my master."  
  
I picked up my bags and went to wait by the exit hatch. 


	10. Breaking the Ties

I breathed deep as I stepped up to Obi-Wan's door and activated the signal. The chimes inside were interrupted by scrambling and the whirring as the door opened.

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan yelled at seeing me, throwing his arms around my neck.

I stood firm as he hugged me, not easing into the embrace. He stood back and looked askance at me. "What's wrong, Padawan?"

A flash of my mother flickered through my mind, then I shook my head slightly and stood up straight as I could.

"I am not your Padawan any longer. I have made a decision and I'm leaving the Jedi Order. Do not try to convince me otherwise; my mind is set."

A look of hurt and betrayal crossed his face. "But, why, Anakin?"

"It is of no concern of yours. Good day, Kenobi."

I turned and promptly left the Temple, despite his pleas to come back.

"Why, yes, Ani. She's up in her room." Sabé stepped aside to allow me to go to Padmé's room. This was only one of the few times I'd entered her building the normal way. I took the turbolift up to her floor and walked towards her room.

Sabé must have called up ahead of me and told Padmé I was coming because her door opened just as I stepped out of the elevator. Padmé looked down the hall and saw me. 

"Ani!" She ran toward me, her hair whipping behind her, arms outstretched. She jumped into my arms and kissed up and down my neck and cheek. 

I held her close and smoothed her hair. "Oh, Padmé . . . " I whispered in her ear.

She gazed up at me, her brown eyes threatening to melt the cold that had built up inside of me from my exposure to Palpatine. She smiled and took my hand, leading me down the hall to her room.

Once inside, she sat me down and brought me a glass of the finest Alderaani wine and sat down beside me. She took my hand and kissed the band on my ring finger.

"Ani," she said, joy shining in her eyes, "I have some news for you."

"As do I for you," I replied.

"Oh, well then, you go first."

I stood up and set the wine, untouched, on the table. If I did not go first, I wouldn't have been able to go through with it. "Padmé, I have to leave you."

I could feel her heart breaking as she said, "Why, Ani?"

Looking down, wringing my hands, I thought, _Why is this so hard? I went over and over what I was going to say, determined I was not going to waver. Take a deep breath and just say it._

"I have made a decision in the way my life will be, and you are not a part of this plan."

She stood up, gingerly holding her stomach. "Ani, I-I thought that . . . " She couldn't speak.

"Padmé, it's nothing against you. I just have new goals in life. You can no longer be a part of my life, and I can no longer be apart of yours. I'm sorry for any pain this might cause." I said it very business-like, carefully avoiding her eyes. I knew that if I looked into them, I wouldn't be able to go through with it.

I turned to walk out of the door, feeling a combination of satisfaction, pride, and, oddly enough, regret. I raised my hand to open the door.

"Ani, I'm pregnant."

My hand froze in mid-air; the world around me became blurry. I slowly turned around and looked at her incredulously. "You're _what_?" I asked quietly.

She smiled, despite the flow of tears coming from her eyes. Stepping forward, she looked at the floor and said, "We are going to have a child, like you've always wanted. Everyone says it's going to be a girl, but I'm not so sure."

Looking up, she stepped even closer, trying to read my reaction. My face was blank, but my mind was reeling. Padmé always said she did not need to be a Jedi to know what I was thinking. She could read me like a book, as I could her.

"Ani, we have created a life, and it is living inside me. _Your child_ is living inside me. I know he is going to look just like you, with blue skies reflected in his eyes, his hair the color of wheat. He's going to become a great Jedi, like you. I just know it. Please," she said, her eyes pleading, "you can't leave me now. You promised you would always be here. I need you now, more than yesterday or any day."

My eyes fell to the floor. So many emotions were flooding through me. I tried to speak, but no sound would come out. I could only mouth, "A child . . . "

She came forward and took my hands, pleading with her crying eyes. "Ani, please say you will stay. Please say you will not leave me."

For a while, I was frozen in place, not knowing what to do. My confidence that I would be able to leave her without a second thought was crumbling around me. _I'm going to be a dad. How can I leave her now?_

All of a sudden, I heard a voice inside me. _Power, Anakin. You know you want the awesome power only I can give you. Join me, and together, we will rule the galaxy!_ I pulled my hands out of her grip, turned, and ran out of the door and the building.

All the while, I felt a war waging inside of me.

_"You want the power. I know it, and you know it, my young apprentice."_

"Ani, you can't leave me now. I'm going to have your child!"

"Power, my boy! Anakin, join me! You will be more powerful than you could ever imagine."

"Ani, how could you abandon me now? I thought you loved me. I know_ you love me."_

Hot tears streamed from my eyes as I ran. I did not know where I was going. I just ran, pushing people out of my way, knocking over many.

New voices came into my mind.

_"This is your fate, Young One, if you give in to your hate and fear . . . "_

"Anakin, I know you are the Chosen One. Do not give in the hate."

I stopped. I knew that kind, worldly voice. "Qui-Gon?" I was in an isolated alleyway behind a strip of clubs, so no one saw the image that appeared before me. It focused and I was looking into the face of my mentor from so many years ago. He was mostly transparent and bluish, now one with the Force, but he was there. He stepped toward me, disappointment in his eyes.

"Anakin. My, how you have grown, and into a handsome young man; taken a wife; created a child with her; turned to the Dark Side."

"Qui-Gon, I don't know what to do. I feel that I am already beyond turning back. Palpatine has a hold on me that I cannot shake off. Many times, I am so near coming back, but he pulls me back, and in even deeper than before. He is constantly in my mind, beckoning me to him. I want to turn back, but I can't. Qui-Gon, help me!"

"I fear I am too late. Only one thing can save you. . . . " The image started to fade.

"Qui-Gon, what? What can save me?" It disappeared before I got an answer. I ran to where the image had been and fell to my knees, crying out into the silent darkness. "Qui-Gon! Come back! What can save me?"

No answer; only silence.

***

"Is everything ready, my young apprentice?"

It was after I had retreated from the alleyway and made my way to the Senate building, and I was now standing in the middle of Palpatine's office. He was sitting in his overstuffed, high back chair, fingers steepled, looking at me through baggy eyes.

"Yes, my Master." Though I had put up a mental block, Palpatine read what was foremost in my thoughts.

"Ah, an unexpected turn of events. Senator Amidala is with child -- your child. Well well well, this could be quite beneficial to us, could it not?"

"Yes, Master."

The beep of the intercom sounded from Palpatine's desk. "Yes?"

The blue image of his secretary appeared in miniature form on his desk.

"Someone to see you, sir. A Jedi Knight." 

"Send him in." Palpatine up looked at me amusedly as the image vanished.

There was a short knock on the door, followed by whirring as Obi-Wan Kenobi entered the office.

Palpatine stood up in welcome. I hung my head and stood to the side as Obi-Wan crossed the office to Palpatine. I felt a searing glance from his icy blue eyes as he passed me. Palpatine came from behind his desk and held out his hand, feigning a pleasantly surprised look. "Well, an unexpected surprise, Jedi Kenobi."

Obi-Wan ignored the proffer of a handshake. "If I may, _Supreme Chancellor_, I would like to request an explanation as to why my Padawan came to me earlier today and said that he was leaving the Jedi Order."

Palpatine put on a cleverly-disguised fake astonished look. "Why, that is quite a surprise, to be sure. But why have you come to _me_ for an explanation? There" -- he waved in my direction -- "he is. Why don't you ask him?"

Again, Obi-Wan ignored his gesture, his eyes blazing. "I have come to _you_ because I sense that _you_ are behind it. I don't know why or how you are doing this to him, but I _will_ find out."

"Master Kenobi, are you threatening me? It is not in a Jedi's demeanor to -- "

"That is not a threat, Palpatine; it is a promise." He glanced over at me, and I quickly diverted my eyes back to the ornately patterned flooring. "Good day, Supreme Chancellor, Anakin."

With a flourish of his mahogany cloak and one last blazing glance at me, he turned on his heel and left the office.

A flicker of doubt entered my mind behind my now-reinforced mind block. _Will I be able to pull this off?_

***

A week later, I went back to see Padmé, but Sabé stopped me, with what appeared to be a look of contempt, and said, "I don't think the Senator wants to see you, Skywalker."

I looked at her, almost incredulously. "You are refusing me a visit with my wife? Please, step aside, Sabé. I _will_ see my wife."

I stepped around her and went up to Padmé's senatorial suite and activated the signal. The chimes rang inside the room, but I heard nothing that signified that she was going to answer. Using the Force, I opened the door, the whirring breaking the silence inside the small foyer that also served as a meeting room.

I stepped inside, feeling the coldness of betrayal hit me at once. It wasn't a physical sensation, but one I could sense through the Force.

"Padmé?" I called quietly into the dark. No lights were on and the transparisteel was blacked out. I walked even further into the room, reaching out with my feelings to find her. She was in this room, sitting in a chair against the wall furthest from me. 

I heard a click and a lamp came on, revealing Padmé's rigid form. She was looking at me from behind her desk with icy cold eyes, and her hands were folded neatly upon the glass surface, as if she were in a business meeting.

"Skywalker," she said in greeting, gently nodding her head.

"Padmé, I know you are angry with me -- "

"_Angry_ does not even begin to describe it, Anakin." The way she said my name, so coldly and without the love and warmth that used to come with it, grated on my ears. I winced.

Stepping forward, I laid a hand on her still-folded ones. "Padmé, please, don't do this. I know you have a perfect right to, but please, hear me out."

She jerked her hands from under mine and stood up abruptly. "Do not presume to think that you can just walk in here and I will have forgiven you for utterly betraying me. I married you because I loved you and I thought you loved me, too. I thought I knew you. I thought nothing could come between our love, between us. But _we_ came between us." I could tell she was holding back her tears.

"Baby, please -- "

The tears turned suddenly to anger, but she cried all the harder. "Don't you _baby_ me! I am sick and tired of putting up with all of your lies! I can feel the change in you, and it's not a good change." She put up an accusing finger and advanced on me, forcing me back into a couch. "You might think that _you _are in control, but whatever is causing this change in you is what is in control. It has pushed me away. You are no longer mine, no longer my Anakin. You have turned into a monster!"

The fury was building beyond my control, and I exploded on her. "Listen, I was willing to admit that I was wrong, but it seems that you don't care. I came back here to apologize to you and you won't even let me fix the problem!? As usual, _I_ am the one doing all the work here, for nothing! If you don't want me, you won't have me! Raise this baby on your own."

I felt that if I stayed much longer, I would have gotten physical, so I turned and stalked toward the door. Turning around swiftly just before opening the door, I said, "I was willing to give anything for you, _anything_, even the entire galaxy! I was willing to forsake Palpatine and return to you; _that _is why I came back. But it seems that you do not want me." I stormed out of the door and, seemingly, out of her life forever.


	11. Reconnections

Feeling betrayed by the only person that mattered to me, I returned to Palpatine. I felt that he was the only person that cared about me. He told me that I was making the right decision, that this was my destiny, that this path would fulfil me. I gave myself totally to him, but Padmé and the child she was carrying always danced around in the back of my mind, shielded by a mind block. Even though I wouldn't admit it to myself or anyone else, I still loved them.

Palpatine had told me that in order to fully become his apprentice, he and I needed to make some changes, which included a new name. He said that "Anakin Skywalker" didn't invoke fear into people at the mere mention of the name. He suggested a few names, such as Darth Pross, Darth Malus, and Darth Vader. We both agreed that Darth Vader fit me the best. He also equipped me with new wardrobe which was all black, from the boots to the Sith cape to the gloves. The hardest thing for me to do was to allow Palpatine to shave off my Padawan braid and ponytail. Even though I held many grudges against the Jedi, the braid still had some significance to me. The emotions that I had fought against as a Jedi were the ones I now embraced: fear, hatred, and anger. 

I demonstrated how devoted I was to my new Master by doing every task that he sent me to do. I invoked fear everywhere I went, with the cold gleam in my eye, the way I carried myself, and the authority with which I commanded those under me. It seemed that they scurried away to hide as I marched down the hall. I commanded and they obliged swiftly, saying, "Yes, Lord Vader", "As you wish, Lord Vader." I basked in the glory of the fear I sent through those pathetic underlings. The power utterly corrupted me, bringing me gradually closer and closer to full conversion to the Dark Side.

About four months after donning the new attire and new name, Palpatine called me into his office to assign me to another task. After greeting me, Palpatine related my mission to me.

"As you know, Senator Amidala has returned to Naboo, supposedly to have a break from the chaos of Coruscant. However, you and I both know that she has left to hide her progressing pregnancy and to have her child. You are to travel to Naboo and bring her back to Coruscant. The child she is carrying could be a great threat to us, if he were to become a Jedi. There is no doubt that he will have tremendous Force-potential, so he would be recognized shortly after birth and taken to study under the Jedi. However, he would be a great ally if he could be brought to the Dark Side. I am taking no chances on the child becoming a Jedi. If possible, convince the Senator to return without injuring her. If she will not come of her own accord, use _any_ means necessary, as long as she and the child stay alive."

I nodded in comprehension and stood to prepare for the journey.

***

The following morning, I rose early and boarded my personal starship. A small part in the back of my mind rejoiced at the thought of seeing Padmé again.

When the ship touched down in the Theed hangar, I prepared myself, running over in my mind what I was planning to say. At the palace, I encountered little resistance. Again, Sabé confronted me, but she knew better to argue with me, obviously intimidated by the change in my demeanor and aura. I was led up to Padmé's main meeting room, expecting to find her sitting behind her desk, hands folded, like I had found her that night so long ago.

My expectations were correct.

However, whereas she had been flat tummied and dressed casually before, now she wore formal senatorial dress, which partially, but not completely, concealed her pregnancy. Once the door behind me had slid closed and I saw that we were alone in the large, open room, I started to stride casually toward the desk. I glanced around at the decor: the vaulted ceiling, the pointed arches, the grand columns, the large window behind her that showcased a meadow and waterfall. _A bit tawdry for my taste_, I thought to myself.

"Jedi Skywalker, what brings you to Naboo?"

I ignored the reference to my former self and put my hands on the desk, leaning forward slightly, letting my eyes glitter and my cape fall in (what I hoped to be) an attractive manner around my form. I focused on her thoughts and feelings, which she tried to hide.

_Breathe_, she was thinking. _It's just Ani. Padmé, control yourself. You are a senator; you cannot cry. You can't cry, Padmé._ These thoughts were laced with pain, sadness, and a fierce determination to hold her tears inside.

I donned the half-smile she always loved. "You missed me, didn't you?"

She straightened even more in her high-backed seat. "I do not see what that has to with anything, Skywalker."

"That isn't my name," I said, casually diverting my eyes to my black-gloved hand, with which I gently traced a line toward Padmé's folded hands.

"What?" she asked, giving me a quizzical look.

I looked up at her and stopped moving my hand. "I said, that isn't my name."

As if covering up her slight embarrassment, she asked testily, "Well, what is your name then?"

"Vader. Darth Vader."

She tried to control the look of shock on her face, but her thoughts betrayed her.

_"Darth" Vader? That's a Sith name. He . . . he . . . I failed him! _I_ drove him to the Dark Side. _I_ pushed him away!_

I again started to move my hand toward hers, this time covering them, caressing them. 

She looked down and let out a ragged breath, closing her eyes.

_It's just Ani, Padmé! He wouldn't hurt you. It's Ani. He loves you. . . . No, it's not. He _looks_ like Ani, but he's not. His voice is too steely, his eyes too cold. Oh, Ani, if only you would drop everything and sweep me into your muscular arms, caress me again, say it was all a cruel prank._

The smile played at my lips again. "You are afraid of me." I pulled her hand up to my mouth and kissed it, smiling at her. Putting our hands back on the desk, I leaned closer and whispered, "Don't be afraid of me."

"Why are you here?" she asked, taking her hand from under mine. "What do you want from me?"

I straightened. "I have come back for you."

The fear in her eyes turned temporarily to joy. I sadistically enjoyed this, knowing I what I was about to say.

"My Master has sent me after you. You are needed in his future plans. You -- and the child," I added, looking at her belly.

She instinctively put her hands over it, as if protecting it from my stare.

I let out a short, loud laugh and turned my eyes back to hers. "You think I want to hurt the child. You think I want to hurt you." I turned serious and stared sharply at her, lowering my voice to a menacing tone. "If I wanted to hurt you, I would have done that already, now wouldn't I have?"

For the first time, she directed her eyes downwards. "I am not going with you."

The look on my face reflected that not many people had had the nerve to refuse me. I leaned forward again and snatched her left hand from her stomach, holding it in a firm and threatening, but not painful, grip. "Padmé, don't make me hurt you. If I must, to force you to oblige, I will. After all, you are my wife." I glanced down at the ring still on her finger.

She gently took her hand out of my grip and straightened in her chair once again. Her eyes reddened and let fall a single tear, but she did not break the eye contact. "I married a man named Anakin Skywalker. However, since you say you are Darth Vader and not Anakin Skywalker, you are not my husband. Now, I ask you, sir, whoever you are, to leave this room, this planet. I will not come with you."

The anger that had been building up inside erupted. I backhanded her across the face, hard enough to draw a trickle of blood from her cheek. Pain exploded on her face and in her eyes as she held her wound, forgetting to withhold the tears falling freely from her eyes.

I expected to be entertained by this, but I felt immediate regret. _This isn't you!_ a voice deep inside me said._ You love this woman and you vowed never to bring her pain. You hit her, you _fool_! What is wrong with you?_

I looked down slowly at my hand, seeing a spot of blood on the black leather. Then I brought my eyes painfully up to her crying face. She couldn't look at me; she didn't move except for the heaving sobs. I dropped to my knees in shock of what I had done.

"Oh, gods," I mumbled. "What have I done?"

I quickly stood up and ran around the transparisteel desk, taking her into my arms. 

"Oh, Padmé, I am so sorry. There was _no_ excuse for that. I am so terribly _sorry_!"

At first, she was stiff, not willing to let me hold her, but she eventually eased into my embrace; she had always felt as if she belonged in my arms. She cried into my black tunic for what seemed an eternity, and I just knelt there, holding her, comforting her, kissing her. After a while, I lifted her chin up and gazed deep into her eyes. 

This_ is who you are, Anakin,_ I thought. This_ is where you belong. _This_ is who you belong to. Everything else pales in comparison to this woman, this face, this embrace._

She smiled up at me, obviously hearing my thoughts. She allowed me into hers.

_I always knew you would come back, Ani. You can deceive yourself all you want, but you will always be my Ani, my precious husband. And I will _always_ love you._

I pulled a hand up and put it on her bleeding cheek. I willed the Force to take this pain from her, take away the blood and the swelling. I had had no training as a Healer, but the bleeding soon subsided; the wound soon left her cheek and no evidence of it remained. I smiled at her shock and held her closer still, being ever mindful of her protruding belly.

"I have a promise to keep, remember?"

At first, she didn't know what I was talking about. As she realized my meaning, her eyes glittered playfully. "But Ani, I'm pregnant."

"I'm up for it if you are."

She smiled broadly as I lifted her into my arms and took her to one of the many guestrooms. 

That night, all thought of my mission, Palpatine, and everything that wasn't Padmé left my mind. The rift between us closed, uniting our hearts and souls yet again. I was Anakin again that night, Padmé's loving husband and best friend.

This reconnection made it all the harder the next morning to take her back to Coruscant.


	12. Back to Coruscant

I awoke to the smell of flowers and coffee. Padmé was sitting at a small table across the room from the bed, wearing a satiny pink robe with her hair tossed back in a ribbon. The table was set for two with many small dishes of Nubian delicacy. She ate breakfast while looking out of the open balcony door at a waterfall and meadow, the breeze filling the room with a sweet aroma.

Upon hearing me stir in the bed, she turned around and smiled, setting her mug down. She walked over to my side of the bed and sat on the rumpled covers. Stroking my hair, she bid me good morning.

I stretched as I pushed off the covers and pulled myself up into a sitting position. I leaned over and kissed her as I stood up and made my way to the refresher.

When I emerged from the bathroom, Padmé wasn't in the room. The table had been cleared and the clothes removed from the floor. Just then, I heard a conversation outside in the hall.

"But, My Lady, he is a Sith Lord! You cannot possibly go with him. I will not let you." I recognized the first speaker as the overprotective handmaiden, Sabé. During the Trade Federation's invasion of Naboo about fifteen years earlier, Sabé had served as Padmé's decoy, stepping in as queen whenever the situation might have been too dangerous. They had been best friends for as long as I could remember.

"Sabé, don't be silly! He loves me. He wouldn't let any harm come to the child or me. He won't allow Palpatine to take me prisoner."

"My Lady, please understand my concern. I simply -- "

"I understand your concern, Sabé, and it is unnecessary. I am going with Anakin and that is final. I strongly feel that he has changed, that he just needed me to show him who he really is. I feel I have accomplished that. Now please, go to the others and inform them that I will be traveling to Coruscant with Anakin, alone."

With obvious reluctance in her voice, Sabé complied. "Yes, My Lady."

As her footsteps retreated down the hall, Padmé reentered the room with an air of frustration. She threw herself into one of the dining chairs and sighed heavily.

"She may be my best friend, but she can be impossible at times."

I stood behind her and massaged her shoulders. The tension surrounded and emanated from her.

"Padmé, you need to relax. Stress is not the best thing for you in your condition."

"Stress is a daily part of a senator's life." She placed her hands on mine and turned her head to face me. "Not meaning to be negative or anything, but why _did_ you come back?"

I stopped massaging and took a seat next to her, ran my hands through my hair, and sighed.

She leaned forward and inquired of me with her worried eyes. "What is it, Ani?"

I felt the battle within me. _Should I stick with my original intention and take her back to Palpatine? Or should I act on this rediscovered love and take her and the child away to safety?_

I heard that all-too-familiar voice speaking to me. _Vader, you are so powerful now, so much more powerful than you could ever be. And you still have so much more to gain by serving me. Come back to your senses, Vader! Remember, love weakens; women weaken! Do not give in to your weakness!_

I snapped back into reality, with a newfound sense of my mission and smiled at Padmé. 

"I told you, love, I came back for you. Originally it was to take you back to Palpatine. Now I have rediscovered how deep our love really is. I'm still going to take you to Coruscant, but I'm going to hide you from him. I will not let harm come to you or the child."

She smiled, obviously sensing the sincerity I had put up around my being and mind as a façade. She rose from her chair and began packing.

In what used to be the deep, dark corner of my mind, into which I had put all my hate and fear and anger when I was a Jedi, I thought to myself, _We can't have harm come to her until the child is born. He is going to fulfil his destiny and rule the galaxy at my side._

***

Once back on Coruscant, Jar Jar greeted us out on the landing platform. As soon as Padmé stepped off of the starship's ramp ahead of me, he ran up to her, completely forgetting proper senatorial behavior. His long earlobes and formal robes flapped behind him as he ran to fiercely embrace Padmé.

"Lady Padmé! Mesa so happy to seein yousa!"

She laughed and gently pushed him off. "It's good to see you, Jar Jar."

Jar Jar's eyes widened as he looked down at her stomach. "Me lady, with all doo 'spect, yousa gotten quite maxi-big!"

"Jar Jar, I'm seven months pregnant."

"Ahh! Me apologies. Congrats!"

"Thank you, Jar Jar."

I stepped up beside Padmé and set our bags down.

He looked up at me and his smile disappeared. His face darkened slightly as he said, "Anakin, mesa no seein yousa in long-o time."

Jar Jar had rarely called me _Anakin_; ever since I had met him, he had called me _Ani_. With a business-like air, I said, "It was good seeing you again, Senator Binks. However, if you don't mind, Padmé and I have some business to take care of."

"Oh, pardon mesa, sir. Go wight 'head."

With that, I picked up our bags and gently took Padmé's elbow, steering her around the Gungan and the few guards who had accompanied him. Once the door to the landing platform had slid shut, Padmé stopped and turned to face me, a look of disapproval in her eyes.

"Why were you so formal with Jar Jar? He used to be your friend. You could have been a -- "

"As you said, Padmé," I interrupted, "he _used_ to be my friend."

She started to speak again, but I grabbed her arm a little more forcibly and led her to the turbolift at the end of the hall. I pushed the button of the floor we were going to. She must have sensed that talking further would not have been a good idea, as she remained silent.

The doors slid into their pockets and I led her out into a grand hallway. I glanced over at her as she gasped slightly. She must have easily recognized the ornate decor. 

Her thoughts betrayed her feelings: _Padmé, how could you let him trick you? Why didn't you listen to Sabé? You cannot let them hurt the child! Be wary._

I smirked as I addressed the Senate guards stationed outside of the newly self-proclaimed Emperor's main audience chamber. 

The guard I had spoken to activated his wrist comm and raised it to his mouth. "Excellency, Lord Vader and Senator Amidala to see you."

The Emperor's cold, monotone voice answered, "Send them in."

The guard looked up from the comm and nodded as the other punched in a code to open the large doors.

Padmé resisted a little as I began to walk through the doorway. I sent a sideways glare in her direction and she complied. The Emperor rose from his chair in greeting.

"Lord Vader! I see that your mission was successful."

I felt Padmé cringe as I responded by falling to one knee and bowing my head. "Yes, Master."

"Rise, my friend." He came around his desk as I stood up.

He looked over at Padmé and his eyes immediately fell to her stomach. Looking back up, he addressed her, "Senator Amidala, it is so good to see you well." He extended his hand.

Her response was a glare and motionless silence.

He brought his hand back down and smiled upon hearing the thoughts that were reeling through her mind. He gently took her arm and led her to a plush, velvet-upholstered chair facing his desk. I followed and took the seat beside her as Palpatine returned to the high-backed hover-chair behind his dark, grand desk.

As he steepled his fingers, he began. "Let us get down to business. As you should know by now, Senator, Lord Vader is beyond turning back. I instructed him to bring you to back to Coruscant by any means necessary. And, as I can read in your and his thoughts and actions, he did as instructed."

I sensed the pain she felt at hearing this. I read into her thoughts: _It was all a façade to get me back here and into this monster's clutches. He lied to me, then he used me. How could I have been so foolish as to believe that he had actually changed?_

If Palpatine heard what she thought, he didn't let on. He continued speaking.

"Now, Senator, it's not that I don't trust you, but we will need to keep tight surveillance on you so you do not try to run away from us. I hope that this does not offend you."

He looked to Padmé as if anticipating an answer from her, but she remained motionless and silent. The ferocity in her eyes seemed that it could have sliced through duracrete as if it were butter. I fidgeted slightly, still not completely sure that this was the best decision. Palpatine looked at me and let me into his thoughts.

_Do not worry, Vader. The choice you made _was_ the right one. I assure you, no undue harm will come to her. As long as she cooperates, she will be quite taken care of. You have my word._

***

After the meeting, Palaptine ordered me to take Padmé to the quarters that he had arranged for her on a special floor in the Senate building. Walking down the hall to the turbolift, she had an icy air about her. Each time I tried to say something, she sent me a seering cold glance that silenced me. Those glances were the only times she acknowledged me the whole time. I thought that if I tried to take her arm to lead her, my hand would have been burned by the cold.

We reached the turbolift and entered. Just as the door was closing, I saw Obi-Wan down the hall. When he recognized Padmé and I, he broke out into a run. However, the door closed well before he could reach it. 

Once at the correct level, I took Padmé's arm and led her down the hall, following the instructions Palpatine had given me. Several Senate guards confronted us, asking for our clearance code.

_At least she will be well protected here._

Yet another pair of guards guarded the door to the room. They required more than just a clearance code. They requested a retinal scan of both of us before we could enter the room. We checked out and I escorted Padmé into the room. She sat down in a chair and stared at the opposite wall as I set her bags on the bed. I stood somewhat to her side, waiting to see if she was going to look at or talk to me. It seemed apparent that she wasn't going to after several awkward moments, so I turned around and made my way to the door. 

Just before I punched in the door-opening sequence, she spoke to me.

"Anakin?" she asked quietly with a mix of anger, pleading, and pain in her voice.

I turned around and quietly said, "Yeah?"

She stood up and started wringing her hands, glancing haphazardly all over the room. She finally sighed and looked back at me. "I have to know the truth about one thing. You can lie about anything and everything else, but please tell me the truth about one thing."

She stopped to read my reaction. I cleared my thoughts of every false and insincere attitude, then nodded to inform her to go ahead and ask.

She lowered her eyes to the carpeted floor before she continued. "About what happened on Naboo, the night you came to get me." She looked back up at me. "Was all that just a ploy to get me to trust you again so I would come back? Did you lie to me when you said that you still loved me? Was it all a façade?"

Her soft brown eyes pleaded with me to say that her suspicions were wrong, that I still loved her and always had. Yet I could also sense her wanting me to say that none of it was real, that I had never loved her, so she wouldn't hurt so much. I stepped toward her and looked deep into her watery eyes. "I swear on my mother's grave that every word, every kiss, every embrace, every touch that night was sincere in intention. I did not deceive you, but nor did I plan to get involved with you again. But seeing you again . . . brought back so many memories, so many emotions that I had flushed from my being. However, now that I have had time to think things through, I have returned to the person I want to be, and that person is Vader. I am sorry, Padmé."

Her eyes dropped again, hiding the tear that fell. She nodded and gestured to me that I could leave. I watched her sit back down, rest her elbows on the table, and put her head in her hands before I left. I heard the muffled sobs even from behind the closed doors. 

I turned to the guards stationed outside her room and sternly commanded, "You take good care of her, you hear?" 

They nodded and said in unison, "Yes, Lord Vader."

I gave them a last glare as I turned on my heel, my cloak whipping behind me, and walked down the hall to the turbolift.


	13. The Duel

During the course of the next week, I ran into Obi-Wan in the Senate building many times. He seemed to have been watching me. Sometimes he would glance in my direction or nod at me in acknowledgment. Sometimes he would use a Jedi mind trick, and I wouldn't even notice he was there until I was already passed him. I would turn around and see him turning down another corridor. This kind of behavior was very odd for him, and I was suspicious.

At the end of the week, I went in for my regular meeting with Palpatine to see if he had any assignments for me. After I had sat down, he began.

"I have an assignment for you, my boy. I need you to travel to Terrigna. I have heard that your Jedi friends are planning on taking the senator from her quarters here and take her there for safe-keeping."

"But that whole planet is an active volcano!"

"They do not plan on keeping her there for very long, just long enough for us to look in all the obvious places. They don't think us clever enough to look for her there. But they underestimate my connections. I need you to go and keep an eye and ear out for them. I do not think you will need to stay there too long, a couple of days, maximum. You will leave tomorrow morning."

I stood up and bowed. "Yes, Master. I will go prepare now."

I went back to my room and packed a few things that I would need. Then I went to the floor where they were keeping Padmé. After getting past the guards, I reached Padmé's door and pressed the chime button. There was stirring inside the room, and she called through the intercom, "Who is it?"

"It's me."

She hesitated but answered the door. Looking at the floor, she stepped aside and let me in. The door slid closed as she followed me to a couple of chairs. We sat down and she kept her eyes on the floor.

"What do you want?"

"I just wanted to tell you that I will be gone on assignment for a few days."

"And why are you telling me this?"

I thought to myself, _Why_ am_ I telling her?_ "I . . . don't know." Turning my eyes to her, I said, "Padmé, look at me."

She raised her eyes, keeping her head lowered sadly. Her eyes were turning red yet again.

I reached over and took her left hand. Rubbing it gently, I discovered that the ring was gone. I ignored this and said, "Padmé, please don't cry. It was never my intention to hurt you. I just have to live my own life. I even came up with a little plan. Palpatine said that soon I will be able to rule beside him openly. We have to keep it quiet for now for security reasons. But when that happens, you could rule as third in command, being my wife and all. We could even have the family we have always wanted, raise our child." I glanced at her stomach. "If you will just -- "

She jerked her hand away and stood up, fury in her usually soft eyes. "If I will just what? How can I be sure that this isn't another of your many lies, just to keep me quiet? No, I will not be a part of a dictatorship, which is what this Republic is becoming. Don't you see, Ana-- " She paused and inhaled deeply to correct her mistake and regain her composure. "Don't you see that your _Master_ is a dictator? He has proclaimed himself Emperor so he can have complete power and control! I will have no part of that."

I stood up, fighting to keep the anger inside. _She is insulting my master! You can't hurt her, Vader. Calm down._ I turned to her and said, "If that is how you want it, so be it. I'll just have you know that I have been disobeying my Master the whole time by still loving you. I was disobeying the Jedi by even falling in love with you in the first place. I guess that my love was misplaced."

She glared at me through narrow slits and quietly said, "You stopped loving me the minute you walked out on me for that monster. Power and greed are jealous mistresses. I have no more place in your heart -- what heart you have left -- than a passing stranger." She turned and fled into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

Fuming, I turned on my heel and stalked out of the door. 

Back in my room, I threw myself onto the bed. The tears pricked behind my eyes, but I would not allow them to fall. 

"Crying is for little girls and weak men!" I yelled at myself. "_Are you weak, Vader?_ Are you going to let some _woman_ who doesn't love you to make you _weak_? No, you will not! You have not come this far just to fall victim to your weaknesses yet again!" I punched the headboard and the wall, punched them so hard that the synthflesh on my right hand prosthetic came loose. 

I knelt on the bed, sitting on my feet, and stared at the palms of my hands. I clenched and unclenched them, hearing the gears inside the now exposed cyborg. Closing my eyes, I finally allowed one tear to leave my eye.

***

The journey to Terrigna was uneventful. When we landed, the pilot asked if he was needed. I said no, so he returned to his cabin on the ship to wait until my business on the planet was finished. I stepped off of the ramp onto the surface, noticing that the ground was almost entirely composed of hardened lava that had been ground down by continual winds. There were many mounds, hills, and mountains of the volcanic rock towering across the landscape. Pits of molten lava interrupted the openness at frequent intervals.

"What a desolate place," I said aloud to myself. "No wonder there were no life readings."

I used the Force and stretched out with my feelings, searching for a sign of anything other than the bleak nothingness that surrounded me. Almost immediately, I felt a familiar sensation.

_Obi-Wan . . ._

He was near. I wondered how I didn't feel his presence immediately upon entering the atmosphere of this forlorn hunk of rock. _We used to be so close, so connected . . ._

I started to walk away from the ship, closer toward the presence of the man I once looked to as my father and teacher. After walking for about five minutes, I spotted the Jedi on a mound in the distance and stopped as he continued to advance. 

Once I was within hearing range, about fifty yards away, he called out above the wind, "Anakin, come back to the Light Side!"

I resumed my advance and called to him in reply, "You old fool! Don't you realize that I am beyond turning back!?"

He shook his head and said, "No, you're not! The Emperor has only brain-washed you."

I was indignant at his insult to my Master. I unlatched the lightsaber from my belt and activated it. "Come closer and say that again."

He put up his hands and shook his head adamantly. "No, Anakin, I will not fight you."

I cocked an eyebrow and sneered. "Then you will die!"

By now, he was within twenty feet, so I broke into a run and yelled in attack. He swiftly pulled his lightsaber -- Qui-Gon's green lightsaber -- from his belt and extended it in defense. I attacked in a fury, feeling the anger flow through me, allowing it to give me strength. 

Even while parrying, Obi-Wan continued trying to coax me back to the Light Side. 

"Anakin, you know that this isn't you! Can't you see that Palaptine is using you? And think about Padmé and the child . . . "

At this last statement, my fury increased fourfold and my offensive strikes reflected this. "She doesn't love me! Why should I care what happens to her and that . . . that _thing_ inside her?" I forced him up onto a mound, where he almost lost his balance. During the second he hesitated, I found a hole in his defense, striking at his arm, causing a long cut down the length of it. He cried out but tightened his defense.

Feeling a sense of satisfaction at finally causing him some pain, I relented my attack and said, "Ready to give up, old man, and meet your fate?"

He looked up at me, his blue eyes ablaze. "I don't understand, Anakin. Why are you -- ?"

"My name is not Anakin! Stop calling me that!"

I resumed my attack as he did a backflip off of the mound. I followed and continued the duel.

"You still love her," he said suddenly. "I can feel it."

"Love makes one weak, and I am not weak!"

We were closing in on a narrow path between two large lava pits, but I was not worried. I had always prided myself on my dexterity and balance. 

Obi-Wan caught me off-guard with his next comment. "What would your mother think of you now?"

Simultaneously, we lowered our lightsabers. I felt that familiar feeling I always had when someone mentioned her. I felt the anger turning to sadness. Distantly, I felt myself losing my balance. My mind was on my mother, how I had left her to pursue my own selfish desires, how I had failed her, how I had let her die. I absent-mindedly backed up and fell into a pit. 

I snapped back just in time and grabbed at a rock jutting out of the wall of the pit a few feet from the lip, but I knew it wouldn't hold me up for very much longer. The anger immediately returned as I glared up at Obi-Wan.

"Traitor," I whispered sharply. 

He fell to his knees and yelled, "Anakin, grab on to my hand!" He was reaching as far as he possibly could, and I could easily have grabbed onto his outstretched hand.

"You have betrayed me for the last time, old man!" I yelled as I felt my grasp slipping. Finally I gave in to the gravity pulling me down into the pit.

"Anakin!" he yelled as I hit the lava. 

The heat of the lava burned my body, ate away at my hair and skin. I was slowly engulfed. As I was going under, I called as loud as I could, "Traitor!"

Then all went black.


	14. Last Hope

I awoke and felt every blister on my body. When I tried to open my eyes, I found that I couldn't. When I tried to move, my muscles wouldn't respond. I felt someone near me, but I couldn't tell who it was.

Finally, the person spoke. "I see you are conscious again, my boy."

I tried to speak, but my mouth wouldn't open, and I felt that if it could, no sound would come out.

So I tried thinking my questions.

_Master, what happened?_

Palpatine's steely voice entered my ears. "Your _friend_, Master Kenobi, threw you into a lava pit, then he immediately retreated the planet. Luckily I had come to Terrigna right after and saved you. I pulled you from the lava and took you immediately to a medicenter. You have sustained burns on ninety-eight percent of your body and all of your hair is gone. They say you will live with the aid of a full-body life support suit. When you are able, you and I will help them design it, for it will be the last suit you ever put on. But for now, just relax and get plenty of rest. Worry your mind not. You are well taken care of."

_And Padmé?_

"Oh, um," he hesitated. "I'm sorry to say that while you and I were gone from Coruscant, she was taken from her room, along with her few belongings. The authorities say that they do not have any leads on who took her or why, but I have a pretty good idea, as I'm sure you do."

_Obi-Wan . . ._

"Yes, that was my guess also, but do not worry. She will be back in our custody soon enough. We will wait until you are functional again, however. Now rest, my boy."

With that, I felt a punch of sleep-inducing drugs enter my system and I lost consciousness again.

After a few weeks of bedrest, I was able to leave the room, with the aid of many machines that kept me breathing and my heart beating. They showed us many models of full-body life support suits of varying designs and colors. However, only one color fit how I felt inside: black. I now had no more room for weaknesses like love. I was in total control of my destiny, and no woman was going to take that from me.

About a month after the duel with Obi-Wan, Palpatine told me that he had finally uncovered where the Jedi had hidden Padmé and the child.

"The fools!" came my deep, voice between the raspy breaths. "They believe that we would not think to look on Naboo?"

"Do not underestimate the power of the Force, my friend. Now, I need you to go to Naboo and retrieve the child. I'm sure that she has had it by now. Leave as soon as you can."

"I am prepared as soon as the ship is."

He stood up from behind the desk, his black cloak rustling as he came around the desk to lead me out of the office.

Since the duel, Palpatine had dropped the fancy robes of Supreme Chancellor and donned his hooded black cloak. He had said that in order to be an Emperor, one had to look the part.

"Vader," he said, resting his pale, gnarled hand on my shoulder, "I feel that the time has come to finally rid the galaxy of their kind. The Jedi will not acquiesce to our demands for too much longer, and I feel that is it best to dispose of them before they rebel. Don't you agree, Lord Vader?"

I looked down at him and said, "You mean, kill them all? Do you have any idea how many Jedi there are in the galaxy? And how spread out they are?"

"Yes, my friend, but where are the core of them centralized?"

My eyes glittered devilishly behind the mask. "As you wish, my Master. I can assure you, I will track down every last one and dispose of them."

His lips curled in a hideous smile. "Good! You can begin with Master Kenobi. I have word that he is stationed on Naboo, personally guarding Senator Amidala. Dispose of him and the senator and whoever gets in your way, but bring the child, unharmed, back here to me."

I bowed. "Yes, my Master. I will bring him to you if it's the last thing I ever do. I will leave immediately."

***

When my ship landed on Naboo, I wasn't surprised to see many confused, questioning, and frightened faces on the guards. I smirked and strode past them all with great authority. Not too surprisingly, the only confrontation I had was with Sabé.

She looked up at me, seemingly unimpressed, and asked, "May I ask your name and business with the senator?"

"You may ask, Sabé, though you may not require an answer."

Her eyes widened slightly as she thought, _Anakin . . ._

I let out a slight chuckle and said, "Yes and no. May I see my wife now?"

She was too speechless to respond, so I stepped around her and punched in the entry code to get into Padmé's chambers. 

Before I could get very far into the front room, Obi-Wan stepped in front of me.

"What are you doing here?"

"Step aside, old man," I commanded and took a step to my right to go around him.

He sidestepped me and inquired again.

"I said, 'What are you doing here?' "

"I heard you, Kenobi. I am here to see my wife and child. Now, _step aside_, old man."

He gestured toward Padmé's door with his hand. "As you wish."

I gave him a wary look and stepped around him. I went through the door to Padmé's bedroom and saw her asleep in the bed. Obi-Wan stepped in behind me and stood to the side of the open door, watching me.

As I stared at the sleeping woman, I could tell by her pallor and the dark circles under her eyes that she was very sick and near death. My heart was telling me that I loved her, but my brain was saying, _You have no room for love. Find the child and leave._

My loud breathing must have awoken her because she stirred and slowly opened her eyes. As soon as she saw me, there was a glint of fear in her eyes, which she quickly hid. She looked askance at Obi-Wan. He just nodded, so she sat up, somewhat laboriously, and pulled a robe from a chair beside the bed. She tied it around her tiny waist as she slowly stood from the bed, supporting herself by holding onto the chair, and addressed me with a slight weakness in her voice.

"What is your business on Naboo, Lord Vader?"

I stepped forward and said, "Don't play games with me, Senator. Where is the child?"

She folded her hands in front of her flat stomach, swaying slightly, seemingly unintimidated. She did not speak.

I felt the heat of my anger starting to fill the suit. "Where is my child, woman?" I asked, more threateningly.

Padmé glanced behind me quickly, then looked back to me. With conviction making her voice stronger, she said, "Vader, I cannot let you take my child. I will not allow you to corrupt him as Palpatine did to you."

I pondered the word _him_. "So it _was _a boy then?"

She nodded, glancing behind me again.

Staring to get suspicious, I looked behind me and saw that Obi-Wan was gone. I swiftly turned around and started running, mentally kicking myself.

_How could you let him get away? He _must_ have the child. That old fool . . ._

Halfway down the corridor, I heard a baby giggle behind a closed door. I stopped abruptly and listened more intently.

After a few more gurgling noises and the sound of a woman humming softly, I entered the room. Inside was another of Padmé's handmaidens, of whom I didn't know the name. She looked up from the child she was holding and stared at me, fear evident in her eyes.

My eyes darted between her and the baby, who had chestnut hair and deep brown eyes. _This isn't him. This is a female._

Grunting a slight apology, I exited the room and continued following Obi-Wan's presence, which led me to the Theed hangar.

***

A hunched, shadowed figure was running toward a star cruiser as its sublight engines roared to life.

"Kenobi!" I yelled before the figure was halfway to the ship. He stopped in his tracks and remained motionless.

I strode toward him as he slowly turned around, his cloak wrapped tightly around his form, hood covering his longish hair.

He looked up at me as I came to a stop before him, standing commandingly at my full height.

"Where are you going with my child, Kenobi?"

He gave me a feigned puzzled look. "What makes you think _I_ have the child?" he asked quietly.

"Don't play games with me, old man. Hand over the child. He is coming with me."

"I cannot allow that, Vader."

Again, I felt the anger welling up inside. "Is it so much for a man to want to hold his only child!?" I roared.

My voice must have frightened the baby, because a shrill cry from inside Obi-Wan's cloak pierced the air. He looked down and pulled the cloak back, revealing a small bundle in his arms. He _shh_ed the child, trying to comfort him.

"Hey, Luke, it's all right. Shh, you're okay, Luke."

I forced the anger from my voice and quietly said, "His name is Luke?"

Obi-Wan's bright blue eyes looked back up to me, and he nodded.

I gazed at the small, wriggling bundle in the Jedi's arms. As I examined his features, I thought, _Padmé was right. . . ._ His crystal-clear blue eyes, still filled with tears, darted between Obi-Wan and me, and a tuft of dark blonde hair crowned his head.

I extended a black-gloved hand and gently touched his cheek and hair. His eyes set something off in me. For that short time, I forgot about Palpatine and my mission. When I asked Obi-Wan if I could hold the child, he resisted a little but reluctantly placed him in my arms.

Time stood still as I stared into Luke's perfect face. I felt such a strength in this small being, and I knew that one day, we would be together in a less-than-hostile situation. I knew that his destiny did not lie with the Emperor and me. This boy was destined for greatness.

I handed him back to Obi-Wan and said, "Take him away and hide him from me. Do not tell him that his father is who he is. Tell him the good things about me, about before I turned into" -- I gestured broadly at myself -- "this. And, when he is old enough . . . " I unclipped the blue-bladed lightsaber from my belt and placed it in Obi-Wan's free hand. "When he is old enough, give him this and train him to be a Jedi, like his father before him."

A tear pricked at Obi-Wan's eye as he nodded determinedly. "I will, Anakin. I will." With that, he pulled the cloak over the child and lightsaber and ran to the awaiting ship. I watched as the hatch closed and as the ship lifted from the ground and into the air. 

All of a sudden, I felt a strange sensation inside, in the small part of me that still clung to the Light Side. I knew immediately that Padmé had just passed away.

As the ship disappeared from sight, I felt the last small fragment of my former life, of my Light, slip away, leaving just the darkness. 

_That boy is my only hope. . . ._


	15. Reunion

__

Years later, aboard the doomed Second Death Star during the epic Battle of Endor . . .

Luke Skywalker and I duel with our green and red lightsabers before the Emperor in his throne room. The boy finds a hole in my defense and kicks me down the stairs, away from the throne. I yell as I fall.

Cold laughter comes from the throne. Palpatine turns his throne from the large viewport facing the battle going on out in space. "Good. Use your aggressive feelings, boy." Palpatine is facing us, sitting almost regally, adorned in his hooded black cloak. "Let your hate flow through you."

Luke looks back to Palpatine, then down to me as I stand up, red lightsaber still ignited. He deactivates his and dares me to do the same with his eyes.

"Obi-Wan has taught you well." I advance toward the stairs.

He looks down to me and says, "I will not fight you, Father."

At the word _Father_, I feel a slight jump in my chest. 

I climb the stairs as he backs up. Once we are on the same platform, I say, "You are unwise to lower your defenses!" Simultaneously, I go in for another attack as he reignites his lightsaber and defends himself. As we hold the crackling lightsabers together, he climbs the last few stairs to the throne platform backwards. He finds the opportunity to make a jump away from me and backflips onto a catwalk hanging from the ceiling. As he lands, he turns off his weapon. The look of determination on his face brings back memories of Padmé.

_How could I have let her down so?_

"Your thoughts betray you, Father. I feel the good in you, the conflict."

I step closer to the catwalk, pushing back my thoughts, and say, "There is no conflict."

He walks across the catwalk, his eyes intent on my masked face, as he says, "You couldn't bring yourself to kill me before, and I don't believe you'll destroy me now."

"You underestimate the power of the Dark Side," I sneer in reply. "If you will not fight, then you will meet your destiny."

As I finish, I throw my activated lightsaber into the air, narrowly missing Luke and slicing through a support holding the catwalk up. It falls, sparks flying, throwing Luke onto the ground. The Emperor rises from his throne, cackling.

I descend the stairs toward where Luke fell. 

"Good, good!" the Emperor says from the platform.

With lightsaber in hand, I look for Luke, either to finish him off or to coerce him to the Dark Side. My breathing and the hum of the weapon are the only sounds in the throne room.

"You cannot hide forever, Luke."

He calls from his hiding place, somewhere behind me. "I _will not_ fight you."

I turn around and continue walking, reaching out for him with my feelings. "Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends." I feel the thoughts running through his head. "Yes, your thoughts betray you. Your feelings for them are strong, especially for . . . _sister_. So, you have a twin sister. Your feelings have now betrayed her, too. Obi-Wan was wise to hide her from me. Now his failure is complete. If you will not turn to the Dark Side, then perhaps she will."

He emerges from his hiding place, yelling in anger, holding the weapon above his head, blade pointed at me. The lightsaber casts a green glow on his face as he races toward me in attack. I feel much anger in him, which fuels him into a wild frenzy. Forgetting all proper technique, he swings back and forth in a mad fury. He strikes repeatedly at me, forcing me back, back, and onto a small bridge over a seemingly bottomless reactor pit. I inhale furiously, trying to get air into my burning lungs. I am hanging onto a rail with one hand, holding myself up just enough to defend myself, with the lightsaber in my other hand. He continues striking, slicing off my right cyborg hand, sending it and my lightsaber into the pit. He relents, seeing that I am defenseless, and holds his lightsaber inches from my chest, sweating and panting due to his exertion.

Cackling sinisterly, the ancient form of Emperor Palpatine descends the stairs toward us. 

"Good!" More laughter. He stops at a distance, donning a seriously evil face. "Your hate has made you powerful. Now, fulfil your destiny, and take your father's place at my side!" His cold, ancient eyes glare at the boy.

Luke looks down at his gloved right hand, clenches it into a fist, hears the gears inside. He looks at my still smouldering handless arm and shuts off his lightsaber. He turns to face Palpatine and says, "Never." Throwing the hilt to the side, he stands upright and eyes Palpatine, shaking his head, and says, "I'll never turn to the Dark Side." He advances a few steps toward Palpatine, who stands, hands folded, sneering at Luke on the stairs. "You've failed, Your Highness. I am a Jedi, like my father before me." He nods slightly toward my still prone form.

They examine each other, both daring the other to make a move. With obvious contempt in his steely voice, Palpatine finally says, "So be it . . . _Jedi_." He raises his hand, index finger extended. "If you will not be turned, you will be destroyed."

As he finishes the last statement, both hands are raised, fingers extended toward Luke, and he releases the blue Sith lightning, throwing Luke onto a fuel cell. I stand up and walk to Palpatine's side, where he is studying Luke somberly. "Young fool. Only now, at the end, do you understand." He throws more lightning at Luke, who struggles to hang onto the fuel cell. Palpatine descends the remaining stairs toward Luke, releasing him temporarily from the lightning. Blue incandescence radiates around the boy as he tries in vain to stand.

Palpatine advances menacingly, saying, "Your feeble skills are no match for the Dark Side." He stands within five feet of the boy as I reach his side. More blue streaks race into Luke's body. "You will pay the price for your lack of vision!"

The Emperor holds Luke in the lightning as the boy looks up at me, severe pain in his blue eyes. He reaches out to me as he writhes on the ground. "Father, please!"

I gaze at the boy, back to Palpatine, to the boy again, who is yelling in pain. Palpatine sneers as he releases Luke from the lightning for the last time. With calmness in his baggy eyes, he says, "Now, young Skywalker, you _will_ die."

He smiles sinisterly as I look back to the boy, his body still smoking from the lightning. Palpatine bares his teeth as he sends the blue fluorescence that will finish off Luke. As I stare at him, Luke writhes on the ground, still calling out in agony, and I watch the child that Padmé gave birth to, my child, my son, dying. I hear that miniscule part of me that still loves her call out from behind the darkness, _Ani, you can't let him die. . . ._

I look back to Palpatine, who is sadistically enjoying killing my son. After one final glance at Luke, I reach out and lift Palpatine above my head. He yells as the lightning flies from his fingers toward the ceiling and down onto me. Luke stares in awe as I throw the monster who ruined my life down the reactor pit. Lightning sprays all over the walls as I watch him fall, fall, fall, all the while screaming, until he reaches the bottom. A great blue ball of flame shoots up as I hang on to the railing to support myself. 

The Emperor is dead.

I breathe heavily; my life slipping from me from exposure to the lightning. However, mixed with this feeling of impending death is a flooding of warmth, warmth which I have not felt in years. The cold within me is melting. I'm no longer Darth Vader, the Dark Lord of the Sith who killed all the Jedi, the monster who did the Emperor's dirty work. 

I am Anakin Skywalker, the Jedi who trained under Obi-Wan Kenobi, the man who loved and married Padmé, the father of the twins Luke and Leia.

Luke pulls himself up from the floor and comes to my side. I release my grip on the railing as he rests my head in his lap.

When his energy returns, he puts my arm around his shoulder and helps me walk from the throne room toward the hangar to get us off this ticking timebomb that is the Death Star. I struggle to remain standing, but all my energy is wiped out. I know I don't have much longer. With stormtroopers running all around us and the alarms sounding, I finally collapse onto the ground, pulling Luke with me. He tries to pull me up the ramp and into an Imperial ship.

He feels my weakness and stops pulling, then lifts my head from the ramp and gazes at my masked face. I watch his pained expression through the eyeports in my mask, and I know what I must do. "Luke, help me take this mask off."

With a quizzical look, he says, "But you'll die."

"Nothing . . . can stop that now." I struggle to get out the words between my hard breathing. "Just for once . . . let me . . . look on you with my _own_ eyes."

He examines the helmet and mask, seeing how to remove it. As the mask detaches from my face with a hissing sound, I look up at him and smile weakly. Without the aid of the mask and vocoder, my words come out yieldingly, feebly. "Now, go, my son. Leave me."

He shakes his head adamantly. "No, you're coming with me. I'll not leave you here. I've got to save you."

"You already have, Luke. You were right. You were right about me. Tell your sister . . . you were right."

I smile as I close my eyes in submission to the beckoning of the Force.

I feel Luke's sadness flood me. "Father!" There is a tear in his voice. "I won't leave you." 

He leans me against the ramp as I feel the last breath slip from my lips.

My last living thought is of Padmé, the woman I loved and never stopped loving, and my children, who have saved the galaxy from the reign of the evil Emperor and, inadvertently, saved me from myself and the grasp of the Dark Side.

***

_Ani . . ._

I hear a voice calling me, a soft voice I would recognize anywhere. There is no need for me to search for the source of the voice; she is standing right before me. She has aged along with me, but is just as beautiful as she was on our wedding day, except now she is one with the Force as I now am. I feel her happiness as she comes nearer to me, smiling.

_Padmé . . ._

As I wrap my arms around her, I notice that my right arm has been restored. I reach up and touch my head; I have hair and my face is no longer scarred. I also notice that I am dressed in Jedi robes. I had heard many times during my Jedi training that when you die, your body disappears from the physical world, and when you become one with the Force, it is fully restored as you take your true form. I had never really understood until this very moment. 

All of a sudden, I feel sadness. As I look down, I see a burning funeral pyre that is crudely made from heaps of sticks. Luke is standing alone, watching as flames lick at the suit that imprisoned me for half of my life, reducing it eventually to ash.

Suddenly, I feel the presence of those whom I had loved during my lifetime: Yoda, Obi-Wan, Mace, Qui-Gon, and my mother, all of whom are smiling at me. I feel the happiness surround me, penetrate me, bind me with all of them and all those who have gone before us, all who are now, and all who will come after.

The white-haired Obi-Wan steps in front of the others. _There is somewhere I think you would enjoy going._

I nod and follow as Obi-Wan and Yoda show themselves to the living. I see that, even though we are in a forest at nighttime, there is much rejoicing all around us. Dancing around a large bonfire in a primitive village are multitudes of small, hairy Ewoks and the Rebels of all different species who survived the attack on the Death Star. Among them are C-3PO, R2-D2, Han Solo, Chewbacca, and Lando Calrissian. I also see my children, Luke and Leia.

Taking a break from the celebration, Luke walks over and leans on a wooden post, seeing Yoda, Obi-Wan, and I smiling at him. 

_I'm proud of you, Father. Take care of Mother and Ben until I get there._

Leia comes up behind him and puts her hands on his shoulders. Turning around, he sees her, smiles, and looks back to us one more time as Leia leads him back to the festivities. We watch as they celebrate their victory over the Empire, Ewoks drumming on rows of black and white Storm Trooper helmets, everyone singing, dancing, and embracing everyone else.

After Yoda and Obi-Wan return to invisibility, Padmé joins me in watching our children. I put my arm around her as we watch the festivities, which have yet to begin dying down. Luke and Leia return to where we are sitting on a fallen log, and I concentrate intensely, trying to become as solid as I can so I can embrace my children. Padmé does the same and the twins sit beside us on the log. 

"I finally feel at peace," Leia says, laying her head on Luke's shoulder. "The Skywalker family is now complete."

Padmé smiles at her daughter. Seeing the two of them together, I notice how similar they are, in appearance and personality: both have chestnut hair flowing over their shoulders; both have soft brown eyes; both are beautiful, strong, independent women.

"Luke, Leia," I start, "your mother and I will be looking after you for as long as you live. There will come a time when we can no longer maintain our individuality and show ourselves to you, but we will always be there when you tune into the Force. Never forget that we love you both very much."

I feel my concentration slipping, as is Padmé's. It is quite an effort to keep our images before them.

"Father, Mother, don't leave us yet!" Luke cries as our images begin to fade.

"Don't worry, son. We are always here for you," I say with a warm smile as I allow the Force to take me into its eternity.

"We love you very much," I hear Padmé say as she follows.

There is no time in this afterlife, just eternity. The most recent people to have died are the most easily seen, but one can feel every other soul who is also one with the Force, just not individually. I know that soon I will also lose my individuality, but I am not afraid. I know that my children will be all right and that they will join us eventually.

There are no material things in this afterlife, but one never gets bored. One can feel everything that is going on with the living, and Yoda says that helping those who ask is part of this afterlife. We feel when they tune into the Force, and since we are of the Force, the Force helps and guides them through us. One cannot feel who specifically it is that is asking for the help and guidance unless one had a strong connection with them during their lifetime. Therefore, Padmé and I are usually the ones to help Luke and Leia.

My life was a tumultuous one, filled with many decisions, both good and bad. However, even if I could, I would not change a thing about it. I believe that the Force has reasons for everything that it does, so I have to believe that everything always turns out for the best.

I leave you with one piece of advice: don't give in to hate, anger, and fear. They will lead to your downfall. Instead, love one another. We need each other more than you could imagine. 

****

May the Force be with you!


End file.
